Page 24 of For Crosby

He nodded at my arm. “The hockey sticks.”

I glanced down at one of the thirty tattoos on my arms. I knew the one he referred to. It had been one of my first. Two hockey sticks crisscrossed on my right forearm. “Thanks.”

“You any good?”

In no mood to shoot the shit with him, I shrugged.

“Well, for what it’s worth, your mother thinks you are.” A small smile pulled at his lips before he walked away leaving me with a pit in my stomach.

This wasn’t the life I was supposed to have. This wasn’t where my mother was supposed to end up.

“Crosby?”

My eyes lifted.

My mother approached. Her once impeccably-styled hair was now graying and pulled up in a messy ponytail. Her brand-name clothes had been replaced with a prison-issued blue jump suit. Slip-on sneakers replaced her thousand dollar heels. And her diamond tennis bracelet my dad had given her on their first anniversary was now a pair of silver handcuffs. The whole scene was still a shock to my system.

She slipped into the seat across from me, frailer than I recalled. She managed a small smile, though tears glazed her blue eyes. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

I forced my own smile. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

She placed her hands on the table like mine.

I tried to avoid looking at them because all I saw were the handcuffs.

“How’s school?”

I shrugged. “I’m getting used to it.”

“Do you love it in Alabama?” she asked.

“It’s not bad.”

She closed her eyes and a look of nostalgia swept over her features. “I bet the trees have changed colors and the whole campus is filled with hues of orange and yellow.”

“It is.”

“And how about the buildings?” she asked. “Are the old ones with their stone pillars still as impressive as ever?”

“They are.”

She opened her eyes. “Some of my best memories happened on that campus. I loved it there.”

I nodded. She’d conveyed her love for Alabama hundreds of times over the years. Especially when the time came for me to decide where I’d attend college. Much to her dismay I chose Texas. But as I sat there in a prison on Thanksgiving, staring across the table at my once vivacious mother, I could see how much she missed her freedom and the outside world.

“I want that for you,” she said. “I want that campus to bring you as much joy as it brought me.”

I nodded, unable to tell her what I’d been dealing with. I was there to make her happy. Keep her positive. Not complain about my shit.

“Have you spoken to your father?” she asked.

I shook my head.

She nodded. “He’s got his own demons to contend with, I guess.”

“Yeah.” I hated him for what he’d done to her. She’d sworn up and down she had no knowledge of what he’d been doing. And I believed her. Because if she’d known, she would’ve tried to stop him. And, she never would have been foolish enough to allow him to put her name on everything. Because in the end, her name on all the paperwork is what got her convicted right along with him.

Her eyes lit up, though the lines around them appeared deeper. “How’s hockey?”

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