Page 76 of My Summer Girl

I mentally go over the list, and the things I want to do. There’s the threesome that can’t happen without Vex, and with Raevar keeping his distance I worry he won’t be the one I do it with.

My heart thunders inside me, beating frantically against my chest as if it’s rebelling the denial of me being with him.

How will I let her go...

He said those words when he thought I was asleep. What about how will I let him go? Because every part of me wants to keep him. My heart tells me it’s already partially his now.

“I want to make love under the stars,” I name the one on my list that isn’t possible in Darchon. He lets out a little grunt, almost one of disapproval and craving mixed in one.

“Maybe we should—”

“You said you’d help me complete my list, no matter how long it takes,” I argue, missing the intimacy he offered and stole away all within a day. Has he changed his mind now that he’s gotten me?

He bites his lip, running a hand through his hair. He mostly keeps it in a top bun, but the last two days, it’s been hanging free, and it’s so beautiful and thick. Dark tresses I want to run my fingers through. Wavy and soft looking.

“Okay,” he gives in.

“There aren’t any stars in Darchon,” I tell him, hoping he’ll see why I want that.

“The cosmos here guides us. Whether you’re lost or in need of water, it directs.”

The day starts to dim out, and we continue our trek toward what he claims is the kingdom. When we stop, it feels different.

I just want the Raevar that held me and couldn’t keep his hands off me. But he’s nowhere to be found. If anything, he’s more distant than my own realm is.

“Let them guide you to me,” I meekly respond, feeling vulnerable as I stare at the sun’s descent behind the horizon.

His face falls and he avoids my gaze. With his big boots, he kicks rocks gently. “We need to get back.”

“Or we could rest here and cuddle up?” I suggest, wanting to take back whatever drove him to pull away from me.

No words escape his mouth, his eyes downcast as we continue our pursuit. My body starts to grow weary after we don’t take a break like normal.

“We’re almost there,” he solemnly admits. “No point in stopping now. The sooner we get here, the sooner we can be bathed and eating a feast.”

I can’t resist sidling up to him. He’s far too tall, towering over me, but that doesn’t stop me from being defiant. I grip his jaw in my hands, rubbing it.

“I’ll keep going if you agree to tell me what’s bothering you.” It’s a compromise. A conversation we need to have before we get there. Something tells me he’s worried about his queen or, worse, he’s worried for me because of his queen.

Big palms cup my face, but he doesn’t kiss me or offer me sweet words. When our gazes catch, his is full of trepidation.

Not once since meeting this ball of sugary sweetness has he seemed so sad or put out. It’s different, like he’s losing a part of himself.

“When we get there, I’ll let you know. Promise,” he mumbles, his face solemn.

We’ve been out here a week, I think. Time here is weird. It never gets too dark, almost like the sun never fully sets. It’s also hard since you can see the stars all day long. Like little glittery pieces in the sky, they decorate it.

I drop my hands, knowing our conversation is over. Staring at the sky, I tilt my head while it’s still in his hold. It’s unimaginable how we are able to see entire galaxies in the sky.

Breathless, I let out a small sigh, wanting to soak up this time we have, bottle it up, and save it forever.

Something tells me as soon as we get into that castle he’s been avoiding, everything will change. And a part of me worries it won’t be for the better.

---