Page 33 of Dirty Play

“Whatever, meet me at Rocco’s.”

Getting in my car, I lean my head back before looking at my phone and a text from Gwen I’ve been avoiding since we got outside.

Gwen

Thank you for today. It really meant the world to Kennedy and her parents.

Thank you for organizing it. They’re a sweet family, glad we could bring them a little fun, even for a moment.

Gwen

You’re a much sweeter man than you let the world see.

Shh… don’t tell everyone my secrets. That’s just for you.

Why am I smiling? And why am I saying shit like this?

What the hell is happening, and why am I starting to have feelings again?

I thought I pushed this shit down years ago.

We make it through half a meal without Harris harassing me, but as soon as our entrées are in front of us and I’m about to take my first bite of delicious steak, he pounces.

“Look, we can sit here and pretend that nothing happened between you and Gwen, but I’ll be honest, I’m a nosy bitch and want to know. So, are you going to tell me what the fuck happened between you two, or am I going to need to make some phone calls or play twenty-one questions to get it out of you?”

I stop mid-bite, looking up at him with a glare, praying to whoever I can that he’ll just drop this. Harris has known me long enough that he can get just about anything out of me.

“We’ve all heard the buzz that something happened between you two. I can either believe the gossip the girls mention—that you couldn’t get it up and she left disappointed, or you can tell me your side of the story.”

“The fuck you mean I couldn’t get it up?! I doubt she was able to walk the next day without a constant reminder of what we’d done.”

Harris just laughs as I fall directly into his trap. Fuck my life—that sneaky ass.

“So, now that we’ve covered that part, what happened next? I mean, to me, it sounds like everything went well… You two have been dancing around each other for years, the tension had to snap at some point, and I bet it was hot.”

“Uh, we’ve barely talked since that night. We hooked up, it was incredible, and if she told you otherwise, I promise she’s lying. But as soon as she walked out of her room, I panicked. I felt like everything hit me all at once, and I was immediately in too deep. I needed to get out of there as fast as I could, which means I was an asshole.”

“So what? You just dipped out after fucking her? This is Gwen, you idiot, not some girl you picked up at a bar,” Harris snaps, his voice full of disbelief and a little anger that I’m not used to hearing from him. “That’s pretty cold, even for you.”

I should be offended, but he’s not wrong. I’m not exactly known as a warm and fuzzy guy, and he knows it. I’ve been the guy who’s gone to a girl’s house and then left after, but those were just one-night stands, expectations discussed up front. I wasn’t just a dick for no reason. But this time, I was, and it sucks. I’ve never intentionally hurt Gwen. I’ve sort of kept her in the safe zone, but I fucked up.

“Well… no. Okay, kind of?” I grumble, tugging on my hair before reaching for my water. “Look, we went back to her place, hooked up, and then when she came out of the bathroom, I told her it was a mistake, kissed her on the cheek, and went home.”

Before I realize what he’s doing, Harris grabs a dinner roll and lobs it directly at my chest. Reaching for another one, he throws. It hits me in the face before bouncing onto my plate.

“What the fuck, man?” I grumble, looking around to see if anyone else noticed, but they’re all focused on their own meals.

“You’re a fucking idiot,” Harris says, grabbing his fork and knife and cutting into his rib eye, looking up at me with a mouthful of food—judgment clear as day. “And I’ve known you long enough to say that you know I love you like a brother but come on now.”

“I know. I’m a fucking idiot, it’s all I’ve been able to think about, but it wasn’t without reason—we both fucking know it. And because of that, I just don’t see how to fix it.”

He points his fork at me like I’m a petulant child about to get scolded. “Cade, it’s time you listen to someone for the first time in your life. Veronica would be absolutely furious if she knew this is how you were acting eleven years after her death. She died. You did not, so stop acting like a fucking martyr and actually enjoy your life.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“No, it’s not supposed to be either. Life isn’t fucking easy, but we don’t give up. We keep pushing through and fighting the battles we need to fight. I think it’s time you stop running from everything and face it head-on, starting with Gwen. You have enough people around you who care about you and want to help you be happy. You just need to stop pushing them away. Gwen cares about you more than you fucking deserve, and you’re an idiot to not see that.”

Before I can say anything, our server brings another round of whiskey for us, and I politely ask her to keep them coming.

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