Page 85 of The Blackmail of Denise Randall

“Mom. I’m okay.”

“I’m a horrible mother. Bad things keep happening to my children. I’m so sorry, Denise. I’ve failed you.”

“Mom—no. You haven’t.”

“Maybe our family really is cursed. Maybe there’s truth behind it after all. My grandfather believed in it with all his heart.”

“Mom—you’re talking crazy.”

“I feel like I might be finally going crazy. Seeing that…” She holds her hands up as her whole body trembles and tears stream down her face. “Denise, that will haunt me for the rest of my life. Why did you jump?”

I step back, as though she’s slapped me. “I didn’t jump.”

“Then what happened?”

“I don’t know. At first I thought Amira pushed me, but now Brennon is here.”

“Amira? Why? What reason would she have to? And Brennon is a sweet young man.” Mom looks defeated. “Denise, before—this, Amira mentioned we needed to talk and that she was worried you might have the same issues as Isabelle.”

Nobody is going to believe me. If my own mother doesn’t, then who will? I shut my mouth, because what else can I say? She’s already made up her mind. Mom wraps me in a hug, and we stand in my bedroom crying together. Both of us broken and feeling defeated.

The next day, I go downstairs for breakfast. Mom had insisted I move back to my old room after what happened. However, I couldn’t help but notice, they locked my balcony door. Dad is already sitting at the table, and Mom is pouring herself a cup of coffee.

“Good morning, Sweetheart. How are you feeling?”

“I’m good,” I say as I take my seat.

Mom places a glass of orange juice in front of me and then takes her seat. I’m situated between them. I can feel the tension, and when Mom does her sigh, I know they’re bracing for a talk.

“We need to talk.” There it is. Mom reaches over and takes my hand. “We know that high school wasn’t easy for you, Denise.” She waits for me to meet her eyes before she continues. “I can accept that you went down the wrong path and got mixed up with drugs. But what hurts is that you didn’t come to us for help. Did you not trust us? Did you think we’d turn you away?”

“I was ashamed.”

“Honey, I’m ashamed of myself. Somewhere I made you feel like you couldn’t turn to me. Worse, I’m afraid to ask, but who did you turn to?”

I look over at my dad and can see his unshed tears. “It was him, wasn’t it? We saw how he ran to you after Keaton pulled you out. Amira told us of some of her suspicions with the drugs and …”

My eyes widen. “What?”

My face heats and I want to crawl under the table. How do I tell my parents I’ve been sleeping with a man they thought they were friends with and is almost the same age as them? I need something. If they would just let me take something to help me sort this out, then I could gather my thoughts and explain. This made sense a week ago; it’s just now I can’t find the words to help them understand.

I feel Mom’s hands on my shoulders and turn to look into her beautiful blue eyes that are full of pain because of me. “Denise, sweetheart, it’s okay. Shh, calm down, Baby. We’re going to get through this. I love you, and I will always be proud of you. I will help you get through anything, but you have to come to me. I’m sorry if you’ve ever felt like you couldn’t, or that I would not think as highly of you. You’re my whole world. Don’t ever forget it.”

Dad’s voice breaks. “It’s my fault. There were signs, but I was blind. Foolish to think it couldn’t happen to our child. Or I kept myself in denial. I—I have no words.”

Mom wraps me in her arms, and my body shakes as I release all the shame and guilt through my tears. I hope someday I’ll be able to tell them everything and they’ll understand. For now, just having them accept me and hold me is enough.

Hello all you beautiful people!

Today, I’m not going to discuss fashion. I want to discuss health. Mental health. Physical health. Spiritual health. It’s so important to talk to someone if you feel you’re spiraling out of control. Talk about all your feelings. Don’t hold them in. I’m going to be logging off for a while. I need to regroup and my family has hired a nurse to stay with me. I’m going to get better, but it’s going to take a lot of time and hard work. If you’re going through something too, know that I’m praying for you.

xoxo

The Fashion Princess

Amber0987

@TheFashionPrincess take care hon

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