Page 80 of Off Sides

JOEY:

Was your phone INSIDE your pants?

I chuckle.

NICK:

Yes.

JOEY:

Why?

NICK:

How else am I supposed to send you pictures of the chocolate starfish?

JOEY:

The mental picture of how you would have to be contorted for that is not sexy.

I cackle as I take care of business and wash my hands.

“Should I be worried that you’re laughing in the bathroom?” Brent is leaning against the hallway entrance when I open the door.

NICK:

How about my dick? It really misses you.

JOEY:

…that is acceptable.

I smirk and put my phone away, shoulder checking Brent on my way past him and ignoring his question.

“You look…happier. Did you jack off in there?”

“Just a little phone sex,” I shrug and drop down onto the couch. “I’m ready for a nap.”

“It’s seven p.m. If you go to sleep now, you’ll be up all night.”

I roll my eyes. “Okay, Mom.”

Brent’s phone starts playing the Star Wars “Imperial March” and he laughs. “Speaking of her . . . Hey, Mom.”

“Hey, B, do you have Nick? When are you guys heading out here?”

Brent comes around the front of the couch and turns so Mom can see me behind him.

“Hey, Mom.” I wave to her.

“There he is!” She waves too with the biggest smile on her face. “I’m so glad you’re home. When do I get to squeeze you?”

“Probably tomorrow,” Brent informs us.

“Good, I’ll make pot roast for dinner. Are you staying, Brent?”

They go back and forth while I close my eyes. The heaviness of the last thirty-six hours has lifted some and I can finally breathe. Before I know it, I’m asleep.

---