Page 47 of Off Sides

Pulling up my message thread with Nick, I finally open it. There’s several messages I haven’t read and I hate myself for it. Nick deserves better than to be ghosted.

NICK:

Are you okay?

We can still be friends without sex.

I miss you.

Seriously, please let me know that you’re okay.

Can we meet up for drinks or food or something?

My hands tremble as I type out my first message to him in weeks.

JOEY:

I’m sorry.

Immediately the dots pop up and I hold my breath.

NICK:

For what?

JOEY:

For being an asshole? For ghosting you when all you wanted was to make sure I was okay.

NICK:

Are you?

Okay I mean.

That damn knot is back in my throat again, making it ache. How does he still care? I don’t think I would.

JOEY

Total honesty? No.

The message goes through, Nick sees it, and the bubbles pop up then disappear. That’s not the response I expected. A boulder drops into my stomach and I force back the disappointment. I don’t know what I expected, but nothing was not it.

I turn off my screen and turn to put my phone back when there’s a sharp knock on the door. My head pops off the pillow to stare at it, excitement and hope trying to bloom in my chest.

“You expecting someone?” Bryce’s voice comes from his side of the room and I toss off the blanket, hustling for the door.

When I rip it open, Nick’s hand is raised to knock again. Our gazes lock for a long second before he’s pulling me against him in a tight hug. Fuck, I missed his hugs. I burrow my face into his neck and inhale the spicy, warm scent of vanilla, nutmeg, and amber that is Nick. The ache in my chest loosens and I sag into him, but he holds me up. I’m exhausted and just want to sleep next to him, but I can’t. There’s nowhere for us to do that and not have awkward questions. I don’t think Bryce would really care, but it’s not a conversation I want to have right now.

“You’re okay, sweet boy, I’ve got you.” The urge to sob into his warmth is almost more than I can take. All I’ve wanted since I was a child was for someone to see me, to want to take care of me. Does that make me weak?

Nick kisses my temple and I smile into his skin.

“Thank you,” I mumble against his throat.

“Can we talk for a bit?”

I nod and straighten up. Nick’s eyes travel down my body and he smirks when he gets to my legs. When I look down and realize I’m standing here in my underwear, my face heats. Shit.

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