Page 64 of Fast Forward

“Here.” He held out a small, wrapped present. “This is for you.”

Oh, man. The ring. “Grant–”

“Open it,” he urged, smiling.

Oh well, better get it over with and then break the bad news.

I tugged at the curly ribbon and slid my finger under the folded corner of the wrapping paper, pulling out a velvet box. My heart raced as I remembered how much I’d longed for this day and now here I was, dreading it. Because I knew I wouldn’t be saying yes and I didn’t want to bruise his ego. Not that his fifty-year-old ego had seemed bruised.

I glanced up at Grant whose eyes eagerly awaited me to open the box. I gulped on the lump in my throat but like a cork in water it bobbed back up. Drawing a light breath in through my nose I slowly lifted the lid, catching a glimpse of something shiny until the full beauty of Grant’s gift captured my attention. A perfect circle of silver tied like a piece of string in a mock knot, with a lone diamond on the end, sparkling under the morning sunlight.

I stifled a laugh of relief. It was a bracelet! A very beautiful, original DSJ designed bracelet, which would have cost a lot, especially considering the size of the diamond.

“Do you like it?” Grant asked, eyes wide.

Those weren’t the words I’d expected to hear. “I love it, I really do, but–”

“Put it on,” he said.

“Grant.” I closed the lid on the box. “I really appreciate your gift, but before we go any further I need to talk to you.”

His eyebrows drew together curiously. “Okay then, what is it?”

“What would you say if I told you I was planning a career change?”

His eyebrows drew so close together they almost collided. “What sort of career change could you possibly be interested in? And why?”

“Well, when I was younger, I used to spend a lot of time drawing and designing things, and I was thinking I’d like to take it more seriously now. You know – do up some proper designs, make a portfolio of beautiful homewares and look into options for manufacturing them. I have a feeling it’d make a great business.”

Grant shook his head in confusion. “So let me get this straight, you want to give up on a lucrative modelling career for… homewares?”

“I’d still do some modelling jobs to make ends meet, but once the business turned a profit, I’d consider letting the modelling slide. I can’t do it forever anyway,” I explained.

“I don’t understand, why pursue a little hobby like that when you can make money from,” he gestured his hands down the length of my body, “this?” He shook his head. “It’s ridiculous.”

I stood, his words jolting me like the paper being ripped by Mum all over again. “Because it’s something I love to do, it’s what I’m most passionate about!” I raised my voice and a few people walking by stared in our direction, but I didn’t care. “I enjoy modelling, but to be honest, sometimes it bores me. I need to use the creativity inside me, do something with my hands and create things.” I moved my hands about with enthusiasm.

“Don’t you get it? You are the creation. The photographers, like me, show you in your best light and the graphic designers and artists enhance the picture to create a piece of art. Most women would kill to look like you and have your job!” Grant stood too, redness rising up his neck. “We’re a team, you and I, and if you go off and do something else, it won’t be the same, it won’t feel right.”

“It’ll feel right to me,” I replied.

“And what about me?”

“Why should my career choices affect you?”

“My career takes me all over the place and I plan on it taking me overseas on a regular basis, as should yours if you stick to your plans of gracing the catwalks. But if you’re serious about starting a business, you’ll need to stay put and that just won’t work for us.”

“Then maybe we should do something about that,” I said quietly, sitting on the bench. “Grant, I’ve been thinking a lot about my life and what I thought I wanted, I don’t think I want anymore. Sure, I’ll keep modelling for a while, but it’s not my passion. I also think I’d like to have a family one day too.”

Grant collapsed on the seat next to me. “What? Are you serious? I thought you never wanted children!”

“Well, let’s just say I’ve been persuaded,” I said, looking him in the eye. “I didn’t want to become a mother for fear of dredging up memories of my own mother, but I don’t resent her anymore. I know what a privilege it is to bring a child into this world and have a family. It’s what I want.”

“How do you know?”

“I just know.”

Grant kept shaking his head. “This isn’t just a hormonal outburst is it? Some temporary insanity thing? I’ve read that can happen to some women, you know.”

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