Page 106 of Loathe at First Sight

Good God!

When he’s gone, Mom says, “Give me just a few minutes. I’m going to go freshen up real quick.”

When she’s out of the room, I look over at Liz, who looks like she’s about to bust a gut if she holds in her laughter for another second.

I point my finger at her. “This is not funny.”

Her lip trembles. “It’s a little funny.”

“Imagine you walked in on your parents doing it!”

“Oh, been there, done that. Have you met my parents? They are all over each other constantly. Have been my whole life. All of us kids knew to knock before entering a room that wasn’t public domain.”

“But your parents are still married. It doesn’t seem quite as weird as seeing your mother—who you have never seen even have a single date—bent over a couch with Joseph behind her.”

“Taking her to pound town?” Liz jokes.

“I was caught off guard, okay? Leave me alone.”

She walks over to me, rubbing her hands over my shoulders. “Aw, baby, I’m sorry. What can I do to make it better? Do you want to have a seat on the couch?”

“Liz,” I warn. “Keep it up, and I’m going to spank your little ass raw later.”

“Would you say that you’re going to pound it?” She balls up her fists and knocks them together.

“You are so not funny,” I say, while trying to hide my smile.

She looks up at me, running her tongue over her bottom lip. “I’m a little funny.”

“Maybe a little,” I say. Not able to resist, I lean down to give her a soft kiss. “But I’m still traumatized.”

“I know, baby. It’ll be okay.”

Mom comes walking back out of her bedroom, readjusting her hair into the claw clip on the back of her head.

“Now, let’s try this again.” She smiles. “Jackson, sweetie, what are you doing here?”

“I came to surprise you for your birthday.”

“Aw, that’s so sweet of you.” She walks over and gives me a big hug. “I love you, son. Just maybe, next time, knock.”

“I didn’t know I had to knock. I didn’t know that you would have visitors.”

“Yes, Jackson, your mother occasionally likes to get her rocks off.”

“Oh, God!” I cringe.

She turns her attention toward Liz. “Hi there, dear. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude. I’m Judith.”

Liz shakes her hand. “Nice to meet you, Judith. I’m Liz. I’m Jack’s girlfriend.”

Mom looks back at me with raised eyebrows. “Girlfriend, huh? I’m impressed.” She looks back at Liz. “How did you get this one to settle down?”

“Mom,” I try to protest.

Liz jumps in, though. “Well, he hated me to start with. But I wore him down.”

“Hey, we hated each other,” I argue. “That really doesn’t sound any better, does it?”

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