“You have me now. I will not let anything happen to you.” She would rather die than harm Maris.
“I know…”
Valda nodded, her hand and cloth moving to Maris’s neck and then her shoulder, feeling the tension there. She wasn’t going to say anything else that might make Maris feel like she was pushing her to talk. As silence consumed them, Valda thought Maris was done with the conversation until she heard her breath quiver.
“I came home after working at the tavern, and I noticed there were no candles lit up for me.”
Valda raised her gaze from Maris’s chest to her face, stopped her movement, and gave Maris her undivided attention. Maris closed her eyes and inhaled deeply through her nose, the images in her head clearing up to what happened that day.
Today was one of those days. One of those days her mother would be shut off, wouldn’t talk, wouldn’t even look at her. She had deteriorated more and more, and even though Maris tried to take her out of the house, take her into town for a meal, her mother was hiding inside of herself.
The only thing she could do was to fake a smile and talk to her about her day as she usually did. Her job at the tavern was horrible. She hated it! She hated her boss, she hated her co-workers, she hated the patrons that frequented the place, but Maris needed to smile for her mother. She needed to smile because her mother needed her more than anything, and the least Maris could do was smile.
As she tied her old horse to the outside of her home and grabbed her backpack, Maris noticed something was strangely off about her home.
Her mother should be home by now. She should’ve turned on a couple of candles for her. Saha always worried about her working late, so she would light up candles. Even in her delirium, Saha always remembered to turn on the candles for Maris.
“Mom?”
Maris called out as she opened the door to darkness. The small kitchen was untouched, and so was the dining table right next to the door. Strange. Her mother always served her dinner, or at least a cup of hot coffee before going to bed.
“Mom, are you here?”
Maris moved to the living space to find it empty. Taking a deep breath, something unsettling scoured through her chest, tightening it. As she was about to head to the one-bedroom she shared with Saha, she found a small note underneath what appeared to be two wedding bands. Maris frowned, grabbed the piece of paper, and tried to read it as best as she could in the silent darkness.
‘I am sorry. I needed to see him. I love you. Be good, — Mom.’
Maris dropped the letter and bag before rushing through the corridor to the bedroom. The door was locked! She locked the fucking door!
“Mom!” She slammed her open palm over the hardwood of the door. “Mom! Open up! Please, Mom! Please! Don’t!” Her grip on the doorknob tightened before she slammed her shoulder in a sad attempt to open it.
“Mom! Please, don’t!” She slammed her shoulder again as tears slid down her cheeks. Maris sobbed loudly as she desperately pulled onto the door with both hands, calling out to her, pleading to whatever god who would hear to please, please stop her mom, keep her safe.
Taking a step back, she drew in a breath, raised her leg, and kicked the door right off the hinges…
And she saw her.
Maris’ mouth parted in an empty gasp, her hands, red and bruised, uncurled, unsure of what to do.
“Mom!”
Her legs finally decided to move. She ran to her mother, moved the chair Saha had used as leverage out of the way, ignoring the crashing of mirrors and wood. She wrapped her arms around her mother’s legs and pushed her up as if trying to relieve the strain of the rope.
“Mom! Mom! No! Please, don’t leave me alone! Please, Mom!” She released her, grabbed the chair again, climbed on it, held her mother’s body, and undid the knot as fast as she could.
As the dead weight of her mother’s body leaned on her, Maris tripped and fell to the floor, yet the pain coursing through her was nothing compared to the desperation in her veins. Maris gathered her mother, moved her so she was facing her. Ignoring the marks on her neck, the lifeless look in her eyes, she pressed her hands to her chest and compressed it while calling out to her until her throat was hoarse and burning.
Her mother didn’t react. The coldness of her skin penetrated through the clothing and into Maris’ hands as her agonizing cries blended with the critters outside her home.
Valda pursed her lips. If she could take away the pain she would’ve done so without second guessing. Watching Maris hold the dangling rings from her necklace, feeling her shallow breath on her neck as she cried was enough to drive Valda mad. She never wanted to see Maris cry. Valda cradled Maris’s body to her, squeezing her. “I am sorry you had to go through that.”
Valda could only imagine the pain and desperation, but if it was close to the pain she felt when Rionach died, then she knew Maris’s heartbreak. Valda stopped her cleansing and moved her hand to wipe away her tear-soaked cheek.
“We were fine. Until my dad died, then everything went to Tartarus.”
“It must’ve been hard to be alone…”
“I’ve been alone most of my life. Except for Melvian. I’ve had lovers here and there, but…” She swallowed hard. “I didn’t want any type of mates because of my parents.”