Page 72 of Puppy Love

“Hey, hey,” Cam says softly, brushing my hair out of my face. I blink, trying to focus my gaze, but no matter how hard I try, I feel like I’m just staring through her instead of at her. Her eyes are wide, a bewildered look sewn into her face, but she maintains that smooth tone as she slides my jacket off. “What happened?”

I try to speak, but my throat closes, only a hoarse squeak coming out. She tosses my jacket into the washing machine and returns.

“Violet, talk to me.” Her hand finds mine and squeezes it tightly. I take a shuddered breath.

“R-Reese,” I manage to croak. “H-he got at-ttacked. They said-they said they didn’t know if he was going to make it. And that their lobby was closed.”

Cam looks up at me, tears pricking her eyes, but she holds them back.

“Oh, Violet,” she says softly. “I’m so sorry.”

I just shake my head, still staring at absolutely nothing. She wraps an arm around me, squeezing tightly.

“Let’s get you into the shower, okay? I think you’ll feel a lot better.”

I shake my head. This isn’t Cam’s job. She doesn’t need to take care of me. She was very clear about the boundaries of this. And she was clear in her avoidance today.

“No, I-I didn’t mean to put you in this position. I’m sorry.” I shake my head. “I just need to go home.”

The void in my chest expands, and I swallow. I shouldn’t be here. Why am I here?

Cam’s head rubs against mine as she shakes it softly.

“No,” she whispers. “I’m not letting you go home. You shouldn’t be alone right now.”

I swallow, the dry lump in my throat rising. “I don’t know how not to be.”

The soft pads of her fingertips brush against the crown of my head as she pushes my hair out of my face. Then, silently, she takes me by the hand and guides me to the bathroom.

My body shakes and shivers, but I don’t feel cold. I don’t exactly know what’s happening to me, I just know I want it to stop.

Cam’s fingers slide underneath the hem of my shirt, her eyes locking onto mine in an unspoken question. I give her a shaky nod, and she carefully peels my blood-soaked shirt over my head. It leaves streaks of red down my face and neck as it grazes the skin. She tosses it onto the tile in the corner of the bathroom. Then, her hands glide around my back. She looks down at the floor as she unclasps my bra. When her eyes draw up to me, it isn’t a look she’s ever given me before.

I’m used to the distaste. The annoyance. And I’ve grown to need the lust. But this isn’t any of those.

This is pity.

I feel so weak, letting her see me like this.

Defective. I’m breaking all my own rules, while breaking all of hers at the same time. I should put my clothes back on. I should leave. But my buckling knees refuse to budge, no matter how hard I try to take a step forward. My chest tightens every time I take in a breath.

Like I’m underwater, sucking in the ocean until I drown. “Is it okay if I keep going?” she asks quietly. Her words graze my skin, goosebumps washing over my half-naked body. I’m exposed, but it has nothing to do with the clothes lying on the floor. My eyes draw up hesitantly, until they land on hers.

I was wrong. Cam might be aggravating. She may push my buttons to a point I didn’t know they could be pushed, and she might have an attitude comparable to a teenage bull. But those eyes are calming. I know they are. Right now, they’re the only thing keeping me here.

“Yes,” I answer breathily, and Cam delicately tugs my jeans down my legs, taking my underwear with them. She helps me into the shower, making sure the temperature is right before I step inside. My legs tremble, and I grip the sidebar as I lower myself to the floor. Cam grabs the green shower curtain and tugs it closed. She pokes her head inside one last time.

“I’ll be right here, okay?”

I know I’m pathetic. I know I’m here, sitting in the shower naked and emotionless, while Cam is standing next to me completely composed. I know, and I hate it. But I can’t think of anything I need more right now than Cam’s skin against mine. Than her eyes guiding me silently to solace. For once, I’m scared to be alone.

“Can you—” My voice cracks. “Can you sit with me?” I shake my head apologetically as the words tumble out. “Sorry. I don’t know...”

But Cam nods, her grip on the curtain releasing. “Whatever you need.”

She steps out of her clothes and climbs inside the tub.

I stare at the iron-stained floor, the water running down my body turning red before it hits the bottom of the tub and circles into the drain. My eyes close as I tilt my head back and let the warmth wash over me.

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