Page 38 of Wrestling With Werewolves

CHAPTER - RICHARD

Nooooooooo! Big Daddy bellows and rages and bashes against my bones as he tries to follow Lola. But I can’t move; I can barely think around a storm of emotion—shock; confusion; deep, instinctive need. I press against the half wall that surrounds my upper porch and lift my head, looking to the moon, praying for her guidance.

Every bit of my alpha nature tells me to follow Lola, because I hurt her. She ran from me, and it’s so wrong, I grind my teeth against the sensation of my skin pulling too tight, anxiety building in my chest. I rub at it as logic overwhelms my emotion. Our difference in age isn’t a big deal—I’m far, far older than her—but wolves live a very long time.

My king is the problem. If Marco knew she kissed me, he’d rip me in two and toss me into the bay for the crabs.

She said he didn’t want her to be forced. And she wants you. Make him understand! Big Daddy’s emotions are firmly in the chase her down now camp, but I keep my feet planted as I roll through all the possible outcomes of what happened. I’m the pack alpha; I don’t always get what I want. Even in an individual haven, as opposed to far up the pecking order where Marco is, I have to be politically smart about the choices I make. I have more freedom than he does, but there are still…considerations.

Luna, Big Daddy whines, morose as he flops down in our shared mental space, dragging his cheek in the dirt. She was so beautiful, so perfect, so ready. She fucking kissed you, you idiot!

Luna. I don’t know how I’d know if she was my Luna or not. The lore about the Luna bond is sparse, mostly lost to history. But what I do know is that Lola was crafted by the goddess Alaya herself to belong to me, to be mine in every way. It’s why we can’t stop touching, why I can’t seem to keep my head on straight around her. It’s why she perfumes so fucking hard for me. She and her wolf are calling for me and mine in every possible way they can. She’s my mate. I know that with absolute certainty. I think I knew it before tonight, but when her lips touched mine?

I’m done.

It’s fucking cruel, so fucking cruel for Fate to promise me the one woman I shouldn’t touch. I’ve been single a long time—decades. I’d always hoped that if and when my mate, or even just a compatible omega, came to me, it would be uncomplicated for us. Being alpha is complicated enough.

But the godsdamned princess of our people?

I growl and shift off the wall, descending the stairs into my main living area. Her anguished scent fills the space as I pause in the hallway, closing my eyes to drink her in. That scent compels me, feet moving without conscious thought. I’m out my door and winding through the streets until I reach her guest house. Her unhappy scent saturates the air, forcing a rumbly whine from my throat.

This is wrong. So wrong.

I’m sorry, I moan to myself. Goddess, what was I thinking?

Thankfully, Big Daddy is quiet in my mind, allowing me to wallow in misery as I stand outside Lola’s treehouse, refusing to barge into her space but desperately begging her to come to the door. She doesn’t, and when I eventually turn to leave, Big Daddy recedes into the depths of my mind.

Hurting Lola last night opened a wound inside me that’s festering, knowing she’s feeling pain and it’s my fault. Top that shit sundae off with Big Daddy’s ire and I didn’t get a moons-damned wink.

At 3 a.m. I give up on sleep. Swinging my legs off the bed, I prop my elbows on my knees and run both hands through my hair. The giant circular window in my bedroom is set to transparent, rain pounding the surface. Big Daddy starts immediately in on me.

You rejected our Luna. If I could break out of here and kick your ass, you’d be dead!

I could have bitten her last night, I admit. I wanted to.

Good. Bite her. Mark her. Fill her with pups. Goddess, they’d be so beautiful.

Pups.

Heat flashes through me at the idea of Lola swollen with child, of her perfect breasts filled with life-giving milk. I don’t think I realized I had a pregnancy kink until this precise moment, but my dick bobs between my thighs, dripping sticky precum to the floor as my knot swells to a painful point.

Needs to get kissed and locked by Lola.

Him giving me that idea does nothing to dissipate the heat. My imagination runs rampant to a vision of her pregnant, on all fours, me pounding into her from behind as her pussy locks tight around my knot, holding us together while I pump her full of me. Of her neck bared for my teeth. Of me cherishing every moment with her.

I fall back onto the bed, my dick a waving flag until it falls hard and hot against my belly. Every instinct tells me to go to her place, but then logic rears its ugly head. It’s 3 a.m. She’s probably sleeping. It would be a dick move to wake her up for an apology.

Rolling onto my side, I pull open a drawer in my bedside table and retrieve a pocket pussy. The treehouse does me the favor of blurring the window so my neighbors don’t have to watch me jack off.

Big Daddy growls as I slip the toy over my cock, grunting at the sensation of all that slick, cold plastic kissing my length.

Go find the real thing, he barks. Fix this.

I ignore him as I yank the toy up and down, teasing the edge of my knot. When the toy pops over the swollen ring around the base of my dick with a sloppy slurp, I pant and arch my back. It feels good, too good, and I’m going to come too damn fast. I’ve gotta take the edge off before I do something rash.

But I keep imagining Lola and all the ways I want to dominate her, ways she’d love because she’s built for me. I explode a half dozen pumps later, snapping my teeth as an orgasm ripples through me, hard enough that my eyes roll into my head, lips curling back as my muscles lock with pleasure.

When it fades, I’m coated in a fine sheen of sweat and thoroughly fucking dissatisfied. Tossing the used-up toy on my bed, I stare at the ceiling for a solid three hours, considering all the angles and trying to come up with a solution that feels right. Ultimately I decide that I need more information. It’s hard for me to trust Big Daddy’s desires given that he seems to leave logic out of them most of the time.

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