Page 19 of The Darkest Parts of Me

“I got a lot done yesterday, so I was planning on just staying here to relax today. Mina said she would stop by if things are slow at the bookshop.”

“Sounds good.”

She lazily sips her coffee while I continue to rummage for food.

“I noticed there was a patch on the roof that looked like it needed some repair,” she says, but I hardly pay attention, my hunger at the forefront of my mind at the moment.

“So I asked Renn if he could come take a look,” she adds, and I eye her over my shoulder, noticing she doesn’t even bother to look up. The bowl I retrieved from the cupboard clanks against the counter as it slips from my grip.

“What? Why?” I fold my arms, annoyed she still isn’t making eye contact. “When did you ask him? Do you have his number?”

She chuckles, ignoring the panic rising in my voice. “I asked Mina for it, and then I messaged him a little while ago. He said he’d come by this afternoon.”

I walk to the table, flopping into my chair dramatically. “Mom. I’m sure he has better things to do with his time.”

“I told him there was no pressure. He could have said no.”

“People never say no when people say no pressure.”

She finally puts down her book and looks at me directly. “Mave, honey. He offered to help yesterday, and he told me to let him know if I needed help with anything else. There are a few things that I’d like to get done around here before I go back home. And I’m certainly not getting up on the roof.” I open my mouth to interject. “And neither are you!”

It’s these moments with my mom when I have to bite my tongue from saying what’s on my mind, because I owe it to her to be better. She was with me every step of the way in my recovery. And as her only child, I want to be the best daughter I can be. I want to make her happy, especially after what she has been through.

“Can’t you ask someone else?” I groan.

She observes me with narrow eyes as she thinks over her response. “Probably, but wouldn’t it be nice to make more friends?” And the puzzle suddenly comes together.

“Mom. You don’t need to help me make friends. I have friends here already.”

She shakes her head. “Maven, I’m your mom. Is it so bad I want you to have some more support here? If you need help with something like a leaky sink or roof, you know you can call him.” I’m unsure if my mom is implying that I’m a loner, or that I am incapable of making new friends. “I’m just looking out for my daughter. That’s what mothers do,” she says very matter-of-factly as I roll my eyes.

She dives back into her book while I munch on my food, making a mental plan for my day. Maybe, while I’m in town, I’ll run into Renn and explain that my mother’s actions are based on her own crazy agenda, not mine.

She casually continues to sip from her mug, followed by the soft sound of her turning another page, and my heart goes from icy to warm. I can’t remember the last time I saw my mom so relaxed, and it’s been ages since she’s read a physical book. I slide my hand over the table and grab hers.

“I’m sorry, Mom.” She looks up, surprised, setting her book to the side. “I know you just want me to have a good life here, but you don’t need to worry, okay?” She squeezes my hand, tears forming in her eyes. “I’ll be fine. I’ll have Mina and Tasha always checking on me. I’m sure Tasha already has plans to keep me busy. This place is my second home, so many people here are like family to us. I won’t be alone.”

She nods, wiping a tear off her cheeks. “I’m sorry, too. I went a little overboard with Renn, didn’t I?” she asks, apologetically.

I pinch my fingers together for emphasis. “Just a little.” But I clasp her hand again with a reassuring smile.

“I can tell him not to come.”

I shake my head. “It’s fine, Mom. He seems like he knows what he’s doing.” She raises her eyebrows at me to say what else I’m thinking; she knows me too well sometimes. “And he’s not bad-looking.”

She covers her mouth to keep from giggling. “Finally! I was waiting for you to say something.”

“Mom!” I scoff. “You’re almost as bad as Valery. You’re old enough to be his mother.”

“Oh, stop. I didn't mean it like that. Besides, I’m not so old that I can’t appreciate a fine-looking young man.”

“Okay, wow. I’m definitely telling him to not come over now!” I joke.

We smile at each other, our laughter drifting through the cabin, and it’s that familiar sound that makes me recall how things used to be, especially in this place. A home filled with joy and fun, only to be followed by the reminder that things will never be the same again.

I message Tasha, letting her know I’m on my way to town, and we plan to meet for coffee at Summit Coffee House later. In the meantime, I want to go to another one of my favorite spots: the lounge at one of the resorts called Snowbird. The lounge has an amazing view because it sits high on the mountainside, and the added bonus is that they have great food. It’s about a twenty-five-minute drive from Main Street, so I stop to get gas.

My father always taught me to never let your gas tank get below half full because you never know what could happen, especially on mountain roads. I start filling the tank, glancing across the street to watch the floods of people walking by, when I spot Renn coming out of the hardware shop. Perfect timing. Let’s get this over with.

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