Page 11 of The Darkest Parts of Me

Every time those words appear, it only verifies time and again that my worst fears are most likely true. I set the photon drive back into the box and slide it under the bed before I plop down on top, putting my hands behind my head as I stare out the skylights above my bed. I play my day over in my mind, recalling the things I said and did—a mental checklist of sorts—making sure nothing slipped or could be seen as suspicious. For years, the only thing on my mind was the next task at hand, whether it was learning more about the people here, the planet, or finding means to live. But now, everything is settled. Finished. This is my life. No one is looking for me, or at least hopefully not my enemies. There’s no one left to fool, nothing else to overcome. But what’s surprising is that I still, even after all these years, can’t shake the overwhelming sense that this is exactly what I was searching for all along in my travels in space.

Or maybe I was so close to death that it was the only thing left to hope for.

I feel the weight of the box sitting under my bed, and for a moment, I wonder what would happen if I never opened it again. What if I truly leave it all behind? Every day that passes, the chances of being discovered dwindle immensely.

Shy jumps onto the bed, startling me from my thoughts, and places her head on my stomach.

“I guess you do like me, and not just because of the food, huh?” She keeps her eyes closed, satisfied as I scratch her ears while I contemplate everything I think I know for what feels like the millionth time.

CHAPTER FIVE

Maven

Imeet Tasha bright and early at the bookshop where she already has a lovely cup of hot coffee from the new Summit Coffee House waiting for me.

“You’re the best,” I say, taking a long sip and letting it sink all the way into my bones.

“Did you really think I wouldn’t have a coffee ready for you? You’re not much of a morning person, and besides, I know how you like it by heart,” she remarks through a yawn.

“You know me too well and thank you.”

We both have our hair pulled up and are wearing comfortable clothing—not bothering to put much effort into our appearance for the task we have ahead of us. There’s really no need, especially since we won’t be interacting with customers, just the hundreds of volumes waiting to be cataloged. We sit and drink our coffee for a few minutes, waiting for the caffeine to kick in before starting our task. The bookshop is so serene in these early morning hours that it only contributes to my sleepiness as the scent of the coffee and books mix together, creating a perfect aroma of coziness, just like it always has.

Since Tall Tales has been in Tasha’s family for ages, I spent many playdates here as a child, and when I was older, Tasha and I would browse and read all the books we possibly could, drinking in words and leaving our young minds full of wonder. It never got old, and it still hasn’t.

I waited until we got home last night to divulge my plans with Tasha, in case my mom was annoyed and didn’t want to talk about it. She seemed a little irritated at first, but when I pitched her the idea that she may need some alone time to look over Dad’s belongings, she changed her mood. For a moment, I thought she’d bring up what I’d heard her talking to Mina about, but her only reply was, “That sounds great, honey. I’m sure Tasha will love having company, and it will give you more time to catch up.”

Eventually, Tasha rises from her chair, the creaking wood bringing me back to the task at hand, and I watch as she lazily makes her way to the counter where a pile of cleaning supplies are stacked.

“So, I was thinking we could start from the back and work our way across. You start on one end of the bookcase, and I’ll start at the other until we meet in the middle, then we can move on to the next row,” she recites with practiced orders.

Tasha had been doing this longer than me, so who am I to argue with her tactics.

I nod, absently surveying the shop. There are about thirty rows nestled in the tight space, and each bookcase is at least ten shelves high, their length as wide as the shop. I have no idea how long this will take us, but now that the caffeine has kicked in, I feel alive. I stand, stretching my arms above my head.

“Let’s do it.”

Tasha instructs me to thoroughly check each and every book, remove it from the shelf, flip through the pages, and check for any damage. For all the leather-bound books, I need to wipe them down with a cloth and apply a protectant so the leather remains in good condition. Most of the books are in excellent shape, no surprise there, the shop and books are in good hands. In the first half hour, we seem to be moving at a good pace, and thankfully, she doesn’t bring up our mom’s conversation we overheard the night before. I start to think that we’ll be done in a couple of hours, but then I make the mistake of reading the books I pick up, and before I know where the time has gone, it’s taken me a good five to ten minutes to “check” each book before placing it back on the shelf or into a donation box.

“Are you helping, or just reading?” Tasha teases.

“Both.”

“We’re going to be here all day!”

I chuckle in response. The rest of the morning is filled with laughter and reading, and I truly can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be, or anything else I’d rather be doing.

At some point, Mina calls us upstairs for lunch, and as we eat, I realize how grateful I am to be sitting here, talking with two of my favorite people in the world. For so long, I wondered if I would ever have the chance to live a normal life again, and I am lucky to say that, for the most part, I am.

We haven’t been back to the book inventory for very long when the bell chimes, announcing someone has entered the shop. I don’t really think much of it until I hear a man speaking in a deep voice and Mina’s peppy tone responding to whatever they are saying. I go back to the books but pause again when I hear a boisterous laugh. I can’t explain it, but I want to see the face behind that beautiful sound. It feels familiar somehow, even though I know I’ve never heard it before. Weaving my way through the rows, I find a spot where I can peek through the shelves to clearly see the checkout counter yet remain hidden.

The first thing I notice are muscled forearms leaning against the counter. I shift, standing on my tippy toes to see his face, and when I do, I can’t help the wave of heat that travels through my body. The man talking with Mina has dark-blond hair, cut short on the sides and longer on top. There’s stubble on his face, showcasing the strong angle of his jaw, and despite the distance, I can tell he has green eyes.

“What are you doing?” Tasha’s sudden appearance makes me jump so hard that I knock a few books off the shelves.

“You scared me!” I whisper loudly, clutching my chest as my heart beats wildly. I don’t even try to pretend that she hasn’t caught me spying. “Who is that?” I ask in a whisper, motioning toward the front of the shop. Tasha walks to where I was standing to check, and when she turns to face me, her smile is positively wicked.

“That, my friend, is another thing that happened while you were away.”

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