Page 96 of Exile and Embrace

Cillian nods and sits down in the chair beside me. “Well, I’ve given a lot of thought to the situation with you and your father over the last week. I understand that you do not want to follow through with his plan, and I would like to give you a solution to leaving your family behind.”

I don’t know what to say. There is going to be a catch to his offer, I can hear it in his voice.

“Finn, I can’t have you being a risk to my people. If you really do want the better life that you say you do, then I need you to denounce your father. You will have to cut all contact with him, and if I ever hear of you being in communication with him, I will kill you.”

“And what would that look like for me after denouncing him?”

Cillian shrugs. “I have an opening as my right hand. Dawson is going to be working in another state to expand our territory, and I need someone to take his place. If you will denounce your father, I would be willing to extend that position to you.”

My stomach plummets to my feet.

I promised myself that I would do whatever it took to keep Ava safe. I’ve wanted to stop being my father’s pawn for years.

Now that there is a way to do that, I’m not sure.

All I’ve ever done is work for my father.

I’ve been a killer, going out and disposing of people who crossed him, who so much as pissed him off or looked at him funny. I’ve never been the man who has been in charge of other people.

Being my father’s son got me a certain level of respect and responsibility, but being Cillian’s right hand would take that to a new level. I would have to get my shit together in a way that I never have before.

It’s a big step, but it’s one that would offer me security. I wouldn’t have to walk out the door every single day, leaving Ava wondering if I’m going to come home.

My risk of going to prison would go down.

I could build a life for me and Ava.

We would be able to settle down here if that’s what she wanted.

There would be a future for us, and it terrifies me to think about that because of how much that is what I want too.

I nod and pull the books and laptop closer to me again. “I need some time to think about it. I do want to cut the ties to the Byrne mob and move on with my life, but there are a lot of different moving pieces to consider.”

Cillian stands and nods. “I can understand that. Take a day to consider the offer and let me know by tomorrow what your decision is. Although, Becca wanted me to let you know that if the decision you make gets her daughter hurt, she will be the one to put the bullet in your brain.”

“With all due respect, your wife needs to earn the privilege to call Ava her daughter.” The words are disrespectful at best, but Becca already knows my loyalty is to Ava before all else.

Cillian stares at me for a moment before nodding, turning on his heels and striding back into the house.

The glass door slides shut behind him, leaving me alone in the sun to dig through the paperwork.

I sigh and lean back in the chair, running my hands down my face.

Though I know that I should jump on the chance at a new life, I don’t know if I can.

Right now, all I want to do is go home and talk about it with Ava, but it doesn’t feel like the kind of thing I can talk to her on the phone about. This would be a monumental shift in my life, and it would involve her too.

I have to talk to her.

I should have gotten on the damn plane with her.

Christian and the others could have dealt with me being in Tennessee to support her.

I felt it when she got on that plane and didn’t look back.

Though we have been talking over the last couple days, it’s been brief. Messages sent here and there are short.

She needed me to be there with her. She told me that I was welcome to come, and I should have seen it for what it was.