Page 22 of Exile and Embrace

I nod. I know all about complicated relationships with parents. “Well, since I’ve already promised to do everything I can to help you find the truth about him, why don’t you fill me in on some of the finer details.”

She’s silent for so long that I’m sure she isn’t going to start speaking.

When she does, it’s clear that a momentary truce has been called.

Though I don’t know how long it will last, I’m going to bask in it while I can.

6

AVA

When we enter our hotel room in Wyoming and two beds greet us, I’m equal parts relieved and disappointed.

Looks like it’s back to the vibrator for me.

The thought only disappoints me more. My little vibrator is nothing compared to the feeling of his mouth and his hands on my body. But it’s better this way. It has to be better this way. We can’t get lost in booze and each other again.

Except, if there was only one bed in the room, I don’t think that I would be able to avoid a repeat of our night in the motel.

I don’t think I would want to.

Finn sets our bags on the desk near the window. “I’m going to go pick up dinner and then take a shower.”

Did not need to know that. This room is too small to whip out ol’ reliable without him hearing the buzzing.

Or the sound of his name on my lips when I come.

Finn checks his pockets for his wallet. “Is there anything specific you want for dinner?”

“I’m good with whatever. Not that hungry.”

He twirls the keys around his finger. “Okay. Well, keep this door locked while I’m gone. Don’t leave the room. Don’t open the door for anyone other than me.”

“Got a problem if I go out on the balcony?” I cringe and give him a small smile. “Sorry, that sounded bitchy. I guess I am a little hungry.”

Finn laughs and gestures to the doors on the other side of the room. “Out there is safe but if you see anything weird, head back inside and lock the door. Okay?”

I nod and cross the room, unlocking the balcony door. “I think I’m going to be out here for a bit. It’s a nice night.”

“Good. Don’t leave the room. I’ll be back soon.”

Finn’s steady gaze watches me for a moment before he heads back out of our hotel room.

As soon as he’s gone, I step out onto the balcony and shut the door behind me.

More than once today, I’ve thought that we should turn back. Especially when he asked about my father. Though I kept most of the details light, it is still more than I’ve opened up to anyone about the entire situation.

And then there is what happened last night and this morning.

I thought that we were making progress. We could open up a little to each other while still keeping our secrets guarded.

After three long years of fantasizing about his hands on my body, I finally got to experience it. And he’s ruined me for other men. There is no way that I’m going to be able to sleep with another man and not think about Finn. Crave him.

But we shouldn’t go there again. He’s a Byrne boy. They’re nothing but heartache and pain.

I know better than to give them my heart and trust them with it.

I slump into one of the egg chairs, kicking my feet up on the glass panel in front of me. No sooner do my eyes start to drift shut, than my phone screams, the shrill noise breaking the peace of the sunset.

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