Page 115 of Absolution

I lie and listen to the whining and cracking for what feels like hours, tossing and turning, repeating the moments in front of the fireplace over and over. She’s here. In my house. They both are, breathing life into it. For the first time in the ten years I’ve owned it, it feels like a home and not just a house with my bed in it.

Preparing a lavish breakfast, I then go and wake my sleepyhead of a daughter. She widens her big brown eyes as she sees me.

“Daddy? Daddy’s house?” She looks around her. “My room!”

“Yes, sweetie, now go see if Mommy’s awake and tell her there’s breakfast.”

Cecilia darts out of bed and follows me into the corridor. I point to the almost closed door next to us. “She’s in there,” I whisper. “Go hop on her bed.”

My daughter swings open the door with full force and bounces into the room. I’m quick to get out of sight

“Mommy! Slept at Daddy!” Cecilia squeals.

I smile. I had no idea it would mean so much to her, if I had known I’d have gotten her to sleep here much sooner.

“Bwekfast!” There are bounces and steps. Kerry groans. “Mommy come,” shouts the little one, and then: “Mommy’s in pajamas, Daddy!”

Slicing the last of the avocado, I can’t help feeling a bit smug, thinking about the robe I hung on a chair in her room a little earlier. I wonder how pissed she’ll get.

Pitter-patter of little feet, and soft steps of slipper-clad adult feet make me turn. Kerry has a little blush on her cheeks, and she pinches the robe as she raises an eyebrow.

“You couldn’t resist sneaking in, could you?”

“Did you mind?”

She purses her lips before she scoffs and turns toward the table. “Oh my goodness! Who’s going to eat all this?” she gasps.

“Me,” says Cecilia and jumps up on a chair, reaching for the avocado. Her little fingers manage to grab hold of a good chunk of the slices before Kerry grabs her. “Yum! Cado!”

“Let her,” I say. “There’s more where that came from.”

Breakfast is a little awkward. Cecilia is chatty and chirpy. Kerry keeps stealing glances my way when she thinks I’m not looking. She devours toast, her black coffee, avocado, tomato, and cucumber, with cottage cheese. There’s also prosciutto, poached eggs, and three different marmalades.

“More coffee?” I hold up the pot.

Kerry darts up, wiping her mouth, and then begins the process of getting crumbs of egg off Cecilia. “We should be going. Be right back.” She takes Cecilia’s hand and pulls her with her. When she comes back, our daughter is clean, and Kerry has dressed.

I stretch out my legs and put my hands behind my head, studying her. She’s got my favorite jeans on. The flowery ones. The ones that fit so snugly around her ass. I wonder if my gaze burns her as much as the sight of her scorches my gut. She agreed to celebrate Christmas here. I caught her in a weak moment right after her mom had told her she’d be going away to the Bahamas for a week with a man.

Wondering if she regrets it, I take a bite out of a lovely piece of toast, butter half melted, slices of avocado and some grains of salt on top. It tastes wonderful, full of sin, just like her. Reluctantly, I follow her to the hallway. I don’t want them to leave.

She grabs her jacket and bag, hiking Cecilia higher up on her arm. “Well... we’re off.”

I lift my chin in acknowledgement. “See you guys on the twenty-fourth.”

Kerry nods and then stiffens. “We said Christmas Day.”

I move in on her and put my mouth to her ear, whispering: “You don’t have a fireplace, a chimney, anything. Let her have the whole package, the full experience. And who knows, maybe Santa is coming this year.” I take a step back and wink.

Kerry looks a little dazed, then her lips tighten as her eyes darken a shade. She crossed a line by sleeping in my house. She knows it. I know it. Something went down last night, in front of the fireplace. Something innocent, seemingly insignificant, but there’s a shift happening between us, and she’s just as aware of it as I am.

“Sure.”

She grabs the bag tighter and shoulders open the door, almost stomping down the stairs. I can’t help the grin that spreads on my face.

Christmas will be interesting.

---