Page 79 of Absolution

For a moment I’m completely blank. Who the fuck is she talking about?

“My friend. What did you do?”

Chloe. Fuck.

The friend.

When I couldn’t find Kerry, after she had run from Chicago, I got desperate and sought out the only one I figured she might have confided in. I was in a dark place. I might have been a bit rough.

“Who?”

Kerry takes a step closer. “You know fucking well who I’m talking about. I swear to God, if you won’t tell me the truth, I’ll never let you in again. I’ll never let you see Cecilia!”

I explode out of bed, stark naked, and stride toward her, towering over her as dark rage rises in me. She’s in no position to make any fucking demands.

She doesn’t move. She has to lean her head back to hold my gaze, and hers is firm, unyielding.

“Did you kill Chloe?”

“What the fuck? No!”

She didn’t die. She didn’t fare particularly well, but she was alive last time I saw her.

“But you did something. I know it. Tell me. I know you’ll come here. I know you’ll demand me to be with you, command me. I know I’m not going anywhere, because you, or your fucking uncle, will make sure of that, but know this Christian: I’ll never trust you again, for as long as I live.”

My stomach churns. I can’t tell her the truth. It’s too ugly. But I can’t lie to her either. I spin around and locate my clothes, putting them back on as I try to come up with what to tell her.

Hell.

When I turn, she still stands in the same position, her features frozen.

“I met your friend once. After you’d disappeared from Chicago.”

Kerry doesn’t speak.

“I wanted answers. I thought she knew where you were. She kept denying it.” I take a deep breath and wait for her to say something. She doesn’t. This is the Kerry from the harbor. The Kerry that first day in the cabin. The tigress, the darkness in her that makes us such a good match. “I— I had to convince myself.”

“Stop squirming, you fuck,” she snarls.

I move forward and push her into the wall, my hand gripping her chin. “You’ve gotta watch that fucking attitude!”

“I don’t care!” she screams in my face. “What did you do to Chloe? Where is she?”

I let her go and take a step back. Pushing a hand through my hair, I wince. She’s not gonna take this well. “I beat her up.”

“What the fuck? Get out!” She pushes at my chest, as if she could move me even an inch. My stomach clenches when I see her tears, angry tears, and her resolute face. “Leave, Christian! Leave! Get the fuck out of here!”

“You wanted the truth,” I snarl. “I beat her up, but I left her alive, some broken bones, nothing she’d die from for fuck’s sake! I had no idea she was missing.”

Kerry’s eyes narrow as she presses her lips into a thin line. “I hate you! I could never love you! Never. I hate everything you are! Get the fuck out of here.”

I stumble back, not from her physical little attempts at moving me, but from the force of her words. Pain shoots through my chest. I don’t do pain, I deal pain. Feelings make you weak, and I’m fucking done.

“This isn’t over,” I growl and storm down the stairs. Where my heart should be there’s nothing but a swirling dark void, the monster in me roaring in fury. I have no idea if I can mend this, but I’m nothing if not persistent. I’ll wear her down. She’s mine. She’s always gonna be mine, no matter what. She and my daughter.

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