Page 101 of Absolution

Twenty-Five

Kerry

I fight to keep up the charade of everything being normal as I leave the mansion. Salvatore has been unreadable at best, charming with Cecilia, less charming with me, his cheek a little red below the left eye, where I hit him.

His parting words to me have chilled me to my core: ‘You and I are gonna talk.’

My fist hurts and I regret hitting him with a vengeance. Anna and I have exchanged phone numbers. Chloe has promised to call me. She looked guarded, though, and I just can’t shake the feeling that she’ll disappear on me again.

Cecilia rushes to Christian who follows us out, hugs his legs. “Kis! Don’t leave.”

He crouches before her. “It’s you who’s leaving, honey.” He glances up at me and a stab of uncertainty shoots through me. They need each other.

“Do you want to come by? Some day? See her?”

Christian stands and his lips pull into a smile. “Yeah. I’d want that.”

I raise my hand in an awkward goodbye. “Okay… See you.”

Then I flee. I feel his gaze as a tingling in my back until I’ve passed the gates.

I don’t know how to maneuver this new world I’ve been thrown into. Christian’s less than friendly family, his outright hostile mother, and Salvatore, who had murder in his eyes when I’d punched him. I hope Anna can help me. I hope Chloe wants to see me. I still need to unravel the mystery with her disappearance and now reappearance. I’m relieved to know that Christian was honest. He actually didn’t know.

Cecilia is exhilarated, full of sugar and happiness. She talks about Ava, and some other kids, and with a twinge in my heart I realize I live pretty isolated. I meet with Mom, Gayle and Rebecca, but I don’t know any other families, or people with kids. At least she’s with Carmen’s children during the days. That’s gotta make up for it. Right?

My head spins as I drive home. The afternoon, turned early evening, was tumultuous, but there’s one single thing that stands out, and that’s Christian’s expression of joy as I invited him.

Christian

I sit outside her house and wait. For what? I don’t know. I should get out of the car and go to her, but I’m frozen from the shock of realizing how much I depend on these two people.

It’s been five days since the disastrous birthday party. Salvatore is furious, but so am I. He deserved that punch, and he should own up to what he did instead of blaming Kerry for being unstable. What the fuck was he doing hiding away Chloe Becker? All this time? Did he keep her locked up somewhere? He’s gotta fucking talk to me. Kerry thought I had something to do with the girl’s disappearance, and at least that’s out of the way.

I’ve also had a serious talk with Bianca. It hadn’t occurred to me that my family would hold a grudge against Kerry. None of this shit is her fault and they gotta back the fuck off and accept my choices.

Kerry. I know she’s home, alone with Cecilia. I’ve circled the neighborhood twice. I just don’t fucking know how to hang with normal people and be what… chatty? What do we even talk about? Weather? Last night’s TV?

I don’t fucking know, but I’ll learn. Maybe.

Kerry

Cecilia jumps on the couch in front of the TV, transfixed by cartoons. I am putting plates in the dishwasher and almost fly through the roof when the doorbell rings. It’s six fifteen Wednesday evening. Christian hasn’t called, or texted, or made even a peep and I’ve become increasingly worried that he won’t come.

When I walk up to my front door with a palm over my slamming heart, I swear to God that I will install a peep hole, because opening this door, never knowing who’s outside, with the life I live, is frying my nerves. Filled with trepidation I unlock and pull open the door.

Christian’s imposing presence fills the doorway. Neither of us speak, we just stare at each other as the space between us suddenly crackles with energy.

“Can I come in?”

I twitch to life, coming back to myself. “Yeah, sure.” I take a step to the side and gesture for him to enter.

“I think this is the first time you’ve actually invited me here,” he says as I close the door. “Voluntarily.”

“Maybe.” I feel him in the house all the time. Every square inch of this house is inundated with his being, or the absence thereof. “Cece is in front of the TV.” I nod toward the deeper recesses of the living room.

He glances at me and an expression I can’t interpret passes his features. “Okay.”

As he moves toward the couch where our daughter sits I flee back into the kitchen. My body is on fire. His appearance makes me breathless. This won’t work!

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