Page 57 of We're One

“I brought gifts,” I say, giving her my most trusting smile.

“I’ll save them for you. Why don’t you call her later and see when she’ll be back.” There’s no way Nikki doesn’t know when she’s coming home. She’s hiding something from me, but I know she’ll keep any secret Sia’s asked her to keep. She won’t break the best friend code.

“I’d rather wait here,” I tell her, my voice firming. She gives me a smile and shrugs.

“You do you, but it might be a very long time,” she tells me. She takes the bag, then waves at me... and firmly shuts the door. I’ve never had a door shut in my face before. It’s quite a new experience. I smile. I need it since I’m feeling worried.

Well, if she’s not letting me in to wait, I guess I’m stuck in this dingy hallway. Something’s going on, and I’m not leaving until I figure out what it is. I don’t care if I have to wait all day, I’m seeing Sia today, and we’re talking. I want answers.

I take a seat, leaning against the wall... this might take a while.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Sia

I miss Zach. I hate that I miss him. It’s only been three days, but I miss the man. He’s been trying to see me, been sending me messages, and he knows something’s wrong, but I haven’t been able to face him yet. I will soon. I need to let him know what’s going on, but I’m not ready. Missing him is all on me because I could drive to his house right now and he’d be thrilled. Soon. I’ll deal with this soon.

For a couple of hours today, I got some peace. I always feel accomplished when I’m focusing on my career. The meeting took me out of my head, pulled me from my personal problems and reminded me of how good I am at what I do. The new client was impressed with my vision for the boutique hotel. I’m excited to get started. Now if the peanut inside me would quit making me sick at all hours of the day, I’d be able to get a lot more work done. The baby seems to think my life revolves around her. I have a feeling it’s a girl because only little girls can cause this much drama so early on. I smile at this thought.

Using the stairs in my apartment building, I climb up them a bit slower than I used to. I’m not showing yet, but the nausea is enough to make me cautious. I really hope this is only a first trimester sickness. If I’m one of those unfortunate pregnant women who are sick all of the way through, I’ll get very grumpy.

I’ve always dreamed of having a big family. It was great growing up an only child because I was spoiled by my parents, but I have to admit I was lonely at times. When I started school, I made friends and that helped, but watching siblings together has always made me envious. But if this pregnancy is miserable for nine months straight, this might be it for me.

I reach my floor and step into the hallway; my steps falter as my smile fades. The anxiety I’ve carried these past few days comes back times ten as I see Zach sitting beside my door, his eyes staring me down. I slowly move forward, my heart skipping multiple beats as I draw in a panicked breath.

I’m not ready for this conversation. I haven’t figured out what I’m going to say. I should’ve known better than to think he’ll work on my timetable. I’m lucky he’s given me three days. I push down my anxiety and give him the biggest, fakest smile I can come up with on the spot. I need to get him out of here. I only want a few more days, then we can talk.

“Hi, Zach. What are you doing here, sitting in the hallway?” I ask, my voice impressively light.

He rises to his feet, giving me an immediate disadvantage. The man is huge and towers over me, not in an intimidating way, but something about his stature demands respect. My hands tremble as I pull out my keys to unlock the door. I could knock as Nikki’s inside, but I need to do something other than reach for the man I’ve missed so much.

He gives me a determined and somewhat sad look. “You’re avoiding me, Sia, and I don’t understand why.” He gets straight to the point. No pleasantries given.

I finally manage to get my key into the lock and focus on keeping my voice steady. I don’t look at him as I unlock the door. “I’m not avoiding you, Zach, I’ve been really busy.”

“I thought you told me you were sick and needed rest,” he counters.

I can’t exactly tell him I’m only sick when the baby decides to announce her presence. “Well, I was sick, but I’m feeling better, and I’ve had a lot of work to catch up on since I’ve been at your place almost nonstop for two months. I do have other clients and there’s a lot to do. It will take at least a week to get my head above water. Why don’t you come back later, then we can talk.” I hope my voice sounds cheery, but it might be coming out a bit manic. Either way, my entire goal is to get into my apartment and shut the door with him on the other side of it.

I step inside and start pushing the door shut. It doesn’t happen. He immediately steps forward after me, and I can’t stop him, but I can’t handle his touch right now, so I move back as he fills my doorway.

“You’re not shutting me out, Sia. We need to talk. If I did something to upset you, you need to let me know so we can fix it. We’re good together. We’ve been making plans. I honestly can’t figure out what’s gone wrong.”

Nikki’s leaning against the kitchen counter as I face Zach. I give her a pleading look and she grins. “I’m glad you found Zach. He’s been sitting in the hallway for about two hours. I’m sure his bum is sore,” she says, not apologetic at all.

A pang of guilt creeps up that he’s been waiting for so long. That floor can’t be comfortable. “You didn’t need to wait in the hallway for me, Zach.”

He looks at Nikki for a moment then shakes his head. “Nikki wouldn’t let me inside so I had no other choice. I didn’t want to miss you.”

“You didn’t need to wait at all. You could’ve left me a message and met with me later.” I take a seat on the couch. It puts me at a disadvantage, but I’m getting a little dizzy. Come on, kiddo, don’t make Mama sick now.

“There was no chance I was leaving. I’ve left you messages and you’ve barely replied. I deserve to know why you’re avoiding me. What did I do wrong?”

A part of me wants to ask him what I did wrong nine years ago, because he left me, and then I never heard from him again. But I don’t bring it up because he’s sincerely apologized for it, and I believe him. I know he wouldn’t do that again. Whether I want to admit to it or not, we’re in a relationship, a good relationship. I can understand his confusion and frustration. I just don’t know how to have the important conversation we need to have.

Nikki can most likely read the panic on my face. She grabs something from the counter and moves over to me. “Zach left this for you when he first got here,” she tells me as she hands me a large bag with a bouquet of flowers sticking up from the top.

I’m feeling way overwhelmed at the moment. “You don’t need to buy me gifts, Zach. It’s very sweet though.” I pull out the flowers, and they smell amazing. I don’t look at what else is in the bag right now. I cry far too easily, and I’m barely keeping my emotions intact without seeing gifts from the man I love.