Page 21 of Last Boy

I hate that nobody knows the real Poppy—the Poppy who took beating after beating and never told on her dad just because she wanted to keep her brother safe. The Poppy who hardly had any lunch money but would give her last few dollars to someone she thought needed it more.

She’s so much better than she leads on. She’s just afraid to show it because that’ll leave her open to getting hurt.

She’s not mine to fix, but right now, all I want to do is make sure she’s okay. So, rushing through the crowd, I head toward the room she disappeared into moments ago.

I push the door open and find her crouched on the floor. She isn’t crying, but she’s visibly distressed. She rocks gently, keeping her eyes squeezed shut. It’s like she knows it’s me in here without even looking.

Closing the door, I sink down the wall next to her. I have no idea why, but something inside of me changes. And I know that at this moment, I just want to be her shoulder to cry on.

Even if she doesn’t cry anymore.

Poppy

When Sutton was taken in the ambulance, the girls, Ryann and Lana, looked at me like I was the one who had given her the asthma attack. I could see it written all over their faces. The way I’d treated Sutton weeks prior made them suddenly hate me now that she was sick.

If I could take it all back, I would. I wouldn’t act like an entitled brat who deserved the number one spot simply because I had the saddest story. I wouldn’t make her want to leave the room when I walked in. I would just separate our differences and not be so nasty.

Looking back, I can see how awful I was. And now, it might be too late to right my wrongs.

I know it’s Walker the second the door opens and shuts again. I don’t have to look to know he came to me. Just like he used to when he knew I needed him the most.

The same way I ran to him the day his parents died. I held him in my arms for hours in pure silence. He fell asleep with his head on my abdomen, and I would have given anything that day to take his pain away.

Walker sits next to me, not saying a word. Simply…existing with me. Just like when we were kids and one of us was going through something bad. We could just be together, and that would make it all hurt a little less. The silence didn’t bother me then.

Now, it’s suffocating.

My body hurts to just give in and crash into his. I miss his friendship and mourn what I always thought we would become one day.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks softly into the empty room.

“Not with you,” I mutter, staring at my hands.

“Why not?” He cranes his head to face me, but I continue to stare down, only seeing him from my peripheral vision.

“Let’s see, Walker. Probably because you aren’t someone I would ever talk to about anything anymore,” I hiss. “You stopped being that to me long ago.”

“And whose decision was that?” His voice grows sharper. “You made that choice.”

“Yeah.” A bitter laugh bubbles from my mouth. “Like I had any other choice.”

“There’s always a fucking choice,” he growls. Gripping my chin, he forces me to look at him. “You, Poppy, made the choice. And now, my parents are dead, and no one had to pay for it.”

“Way to pile onto this already-fucking-awful moment! They overdosed, Walker! Jesus!” I shake my head. “They chose to stick that needle in their arm.”

“Those drugs were cut with a deadly amount of fentanyl, and you know it. Your dad knew it back then too.” His grip tightens on my chin, and his eyes bounce between mine and my lips. “Just admit that you fucking lied to save your own ass. To keep your family together.”

Anger courses through every part of my body. Overtaking my veins and strangling me from the inside out.

How could he think it was that cut and dry?

“I lied to keep Jake from being thrown into a system where he wouldn’t get what he needed!” I scream in his face before quickly pulling out of his hold and standing up. “You’ll never get that though! To you, all I was back then was the girl who was fucking obsessed with you. The girl who would choose you above anyone else!” I shake my head at him, snarling, “Well, guess what. I’m not that girl anymore, Walker. And sometimes, you have to protect your family! I chose Jake. I chose my family! It had nothing to do with Ron.”

He stands, towering over me.

But before he can speak, I poke my finger into his chest. “I will not beg for forgiveness when I did what I had to do to help Jake make his dreams come true,” I growl. “Like I said before, stay the fuck away from me.”

I don’t even make it a whole step before his hands grab my waist and spin me around to face him. He backs me up to the wall, holding my wrists down. His lips are on mine, and his tongue flicks against mine. And I want to be the bad bitch who pushes him away and stands strong. But it’s impossible. I’ve loved him from day one. I’ve thought about this kiss for most of my life.

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