Page 48 of When You Smile

“What’s up?”

She turned at the sound of the male voice only to find herself looking up and into the eyes of Danny McHenry, otherwise known as Charlie’s boyfriend. The beer went still on the way down from her lips. Other than a brief exchange at the library, they’d never had a true conversation. She’d forgotten he was one of the frat sponsors. He’d been there the night Charlie had walked a drunken Taryn home. “Not much. Hey.”

“Taryn, right?”

She nodded.

“On your own tonight?” He seemed friendly enough. She wasn’t sure if that was good or bad news.

“I’m with some friends.” She gestured across the room to where Sasha and her girl were dancing like the world was ending, bless their happy little hearts. “What about you?” She offered him a smile. Charlie had said he wasn’t a bad guy, so she’d follow her lead.

“Just checking in on the party.” He surveyed the room a moment. “Perfect opportunity for you to kiss someone else’s girlfriend. I hear you’re good at that.” Taryn blinked, nearly knocked over by the comment. “Hope you fucking enjoy yourself.”

He didn’t seem to want a response, and by the time she could have formulated one, he was gone. Okay, that had stung. “Fuck,” she said, allowing her head to drop back. Charlie was MIA. The boyfriend hated her. And she was all alone with an aching heart. She stared across the room at the trash can punch, knowing a quick way to put an end to her overly active thoughts.

No way.

Instead, she decided to call it an early night and slide into bed and lose herself in a bingefest of procedurals from ten years ago while mainlining Sour Patch Kids until she passed out. She liked the plan and walked home with a dark cloud over her head, very aware of how alone she felt.

As she approached Alexander Hall, she blinked to clear her vision because sitting on the steps out front was a blonde who looked a little like Charlie, even though she’d yet to see her face. As Taryn approached, the blonde turned, and the blue eyes that sent her every time were staring back at her. They weren’t sad like Taryn’s either. They were soft, inviting, and—God—a breath of fresh air.

When Charlie saw Taryn, she offered a smile and a slight wave. Just the tiny gesture calmed the storm within Taryn.

“I know it’s late, but I wanted to see you.”

“You did?”

Charlie nodded. “Gray said you were out at a party, so I thought I’d wait awhile and see if you came home.”

“You could have sent a text.”

“Seemed impersonal at the time.” Why was the world so much better, so much calmer when Charlie was near? At the same time, Taryn worried what Charlie would have to say in the next few moments. She dug her nails into her palms. The pain somehow propped her up. Maybe she’d say that Taryn would always be special to her, but she had no plans to walk away from Danny. Then what? They’d return to their friendship, wiping away any memory of that night in Charlie’s apartment. She could ask where she stood, but prolonging the potential blow seemed safer. “Wanna walk?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah. I have time.” She had time? A tamped-down response to how Taryn truly felt. She was apparently going with nonchalance. They shared a smile that Taryn still felt carried question marks. A smile could mean so many things. Her heart thudded, and they’d only been walking beneath the shadows of the campus trees for a minute at most. No one had said anything, and the tension only seemed to expand with each step before Taryn decided she couldn’t take it anymore.

“How are you?” she asked.

“Well. It’s been a strange week.”

“You could say that again.” Why were they not them right now? The anxiety of the past few days seemed to catch up with Taryn in an uncomfortable flurry she couldn’t smother. “And I’m just going to let you off the hook. If you’re here to smooth things over and pat me on the head, we can skip it.” Charlie watched her, listening, but said nothing. “And you can ride off into the sunset with Danny, and I won’t hold it against you. Deal? We’ll be just fine.”

“Hold on a second.”

“We won’t be fine? Then I don’t know what you want from me. I’m a little on edge about all of this and equally apologetic about that.”

Charlie paused their walk alongside the foreign language building that was responsible for so many of Taryn’s late-night study sessions. Tonight it offered a halo of light that allowed Taryn to see Charlie’s face as she frowned at her. “I think I’m gonna need you to slow down,” Charlie said.

“Yeah. Fine. I can do that.” But that was easier said than done. Her emotions swirled, and so did her nerves.

“Taryn.” Charlie inclined her head to the side, a questioning look on her face. She had a tiny scar above her eye, barely noticeable, but Taryn adored it. She adored so much about Charlie, from the way she tucked her jeans into her boots to her vanilla and tangerine scent that drove Taryn wild. But hoping for something that was never going to happen was taking a lot out of her, and she just needed to let her heart off the hook, let it grieve, and find a way to accept things as they were. Damn that scar and the way it made her want things she had no business wanting.

“What?” she fired back with an edge she couldn’t mask.

“I came to find you because I wanted to talk to you about the other night.”

“Okay. Let’s talk about it.” Taryn shoved her hands into her pockets, distantly aware of the slight taste of beer on her lips. The party now seemed so very long ago.

“I want you to know that it mattered a lot to me.”

---