Page 41 of Return To You

I take a deep breath. “It’s just… I wasn’t prepared. There’s nothing between us, obviously.”

“Right,” she says. “Maybe—maybe you should talk it out with him. You know? Instead of him being this ghost from the past for you, if you got to know the new Ethan, it could sort of… exorcize it for you. Be done with him for good.”

That makes sense. She’s totally right. I need to exorcize the past. By making Ethan a part of my present life instead of trying to avoid him, I can put him back where he belongs. With my childhood friends. Nothing more. I probably won’t even like him that much.

“Also,” Haley continues, “you never had closure. You deserve closure.”

And again, she’s right. So right. I should have said yes to his offer of having coffee together. Instead of pushing him away at the farm the other day, I should have agreed to that conversation. Adult to adult.

None of this teen angst business. I’m better than that. “Thanks,” I tell Haley, believing wholeheartedly that this is what I need to do.

I’ll talk to him tomorrow.

ten

Ethan

It’s the last day of preseason camp, and last night, I had a sense of dread. Of loss. Of something good coming to an end that I didn’t want to.

Sure, it was the kids. That’s what I told myself. They’re great kids.

But, really, who am I kidding?

It’s Grace.

Of course it’s her.

It was always Grace.

I’m about to, probably, never see her again. For real, this time.

I don’t think I can ever come back to Emerald Creek.

Fuck me, but the pain is too sharp. Too real. Too present, even after all these years.

It’s almost as if it’s now condensed.

But before I go, before the curtain, really, really falls, I want to know.

I want her to talk to me. Tell me what happened, in her mind, that she could just drop me like that.

So, throughout the week, I came up with a plan.

Bring her to the crime scene.

Bring her to the lake.

And what better excuse than an end-of-camp barbecue? It’s what everyone does. Hell, one of the parents even suggested it—with a tactful hint, on my part. They even ended up organizing it.

Before her massage, I take Tracy aside. “You make sure Grace comes, will ya? She works too hard.”

“Gotcha, Coach. On it.”

And then I hear them. On the other side of the wall. Grace and Tracy.

“Oh, I don’t know. I need to get home to my cat.”

Giggles. “Grace, don’t tell me you’re a cat lady!” She calls her Grace now? No more Ms. Grace.

---