Like I’m a total stranger.
She eats salad.
When everyone’s seated, I load a plate with burgers, hot dogs, and chargrilled marinated chicken and squeeze on a bench across from them.
I set the plate in front of her. “Help yourself.”
“Oh thanks,” she says in a crisp, airy voice. She looks everywhere except at me. She doesn’t help herself.
As I stare at her, her cheekbones color, and the skin above her breasts turns reddish in places.
“Massage was great,” I say, still staring at Grace, feeling Haley’s eyes drilling daggers in my skull again.
“The lotion help?”
“I dunno. Didn’t try it yet.”
She blinks a few times like it’s a stupid thing to say, but she has no comeback. No advice.
And above all, she still. Doesn’t. Meet. My. Gaze.
I can’t confront her here, right? I can’t come back, ten years later, and make a scene in front of the whole village because a girl I thought loved me seems to think I’m some piece of shit now.
Just because I didn’t get closure at the time doesn’t mean I can get it now.
We’re on different timelines. I should have confronted her ten years ago. Now’s too late.
Now, it doesn’t matter. She moved on, got married. Got divorced. I’m a blip in her life. I can’t expect her to feel anything about me.
“Who’s that little cutie?” I ask, looking at Skye who has climbed onto Grace’s lap and looks just like her.
“I’m Skye,” the mini Grace answers. “Who are you?” She reaches to the platter, takes a hotdog, bites it, then sets it on the side of Grace’s plate.
“I’m Ethan.”
She widens her eyes at me. “Uncle Justin’s big brother?”
That gets me a chuckle. So sweet that she calls him Uncle. “That’s me.”
“Wow.” She takes another bite of her hotdog.
Wow what? I don’t know much about kids, so I have no idea if this is good or bad.
“Did you kill a lot of bad people?”
Um. Again, not sure what to make of that question. “Not a lot.”
She looks disappointed. Then her eyes brighten, and she straightens with excitement. “Did you take them as prisoners?”
“No prisoners.”
“That’s okay,” she says in a comforting tone. “I’m sure you did your best.”
Haley, Grace, and I share a brief laugh, and Grace’s gaze finally meets mine, setting a burning path from my irises down to a place right below my ribcage. The feeling stays there as Grace visibly relaxes.
“Hey, man.” Chris walks up to us, his arm around the shoulders of a pretty young woman. Shit. I haven’t seen him in ten years. He’s changed. He’s… a man now. I remember a skinny, angsty teenager. He’s nothing like that. Looking at him, I measure how much time has passed. How we all must have changed.
“Daddy! This is Uncle Justin’s brother!” Skye squeals as I stand up to greet him.