Page 108 of Return To You

“Three years.”

“You spent three years in Germany?”

“Yup.”

“Wow. Germany. For someone who doesn’t want to live in the cold? That’s not exactly the tropics.”

He shrugs.

“Did you like it there? In Germany.”

Another shrug.

That can’t be classified. “What did you like about it?”

He still doesn’t answer.

“The beer? The job?”

He looks down at me and kisses the top of my head.

My heartbeat drops. “Oh. A woman.”

He kisses the top of my head again. That’s a yes.

“What is… was her name?” Is there still a woman? No, right?

He huffs. “Uh—Ilse.”

My heartbeat picks up, but I force it down. “Ilse. That’s a pretty name. What happened?”

He takes a deep breath but doesn’t answer.

“We don’t need to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

He strokes my shoulder repeatedly. “It’s fine. It’s just… I never put it into words, what happened. She uh… we were supposed to get married. I mean we… talked about it. And she wanted to. But I never… I never got around to proposing. And that seemed to be a big deal for her. She wanted me to propose. Not just do the paperwork at Town Hall and be done with it. I—I make it sound like I was a jerk. I don’t think I was. But now that I think about it, maybe I was. Anyway… We had a big argument, the day before I was going off base for a month. And I hated that. I hated that I argued with the woman I was going to marry. So I promised myself I’d propose when I came back. And then while I was away, I kind of…” He takes another deep breath, his hand now caressing my arm. “The days went by and I didn’t miss her. I realized I’d only think about her when she called. And I had to put a reminder on my phone to call her.”

“Well—were you very busy? That could explain it.” How awkward is it, that I’m trying to find him excuses.

He leans over me to kiss the top of my head. “No. It was a boring as hell mission. The kind when you just sit, you need to stay awake, and you’re just waiting for intel that never comes in. Lots of time to think about shit. And the shit I was thinking about… it wasn’t her. The woman I was thinking about… it wasn’t her.” He squeezes me softly, trailing his lips along my hair. “I’d only ever missed one person in my life, Grace. And so, after that, I broke things off with Ilse and decided it was time for a bigger career move.”

I take a while to process this. I’d never pictured Ethan with someone else, but of course he would have been. Of course he’d be in a relationship. He’s such a good, solid person. How is he going to deal with being alone in Brussels? “Brussels is pretty close to Germany,” I venture.

He turns me in his arms, his gaze roaming my face. “So?”

“Nothing,” I breathe.

He kisses me softly. “Good.”

Then he takes a breath, moves his head around, and I know he’s going to ask me about my failed marriage. It’s only fair. I owe him the explanation.

“So…” he starts. “What’s up with the box?”

The box? Shit. The box. It’s on the floor. I was making space in it to add… ohmygod, this is so embarrassing. “What box?”

“The hoarder’s delight.”

“The what now?”

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