Page 102 of Return To You

I told Mom and Dad about being gone for a few days, after my phone chimed several times. Using our encryption app, my C.O. was filling me in on what to expect. It will be a high-level strategy meeting about our cryptanalysis program for NATO. What we can and cannot share with our allies. How we should proceed moving forward. I’m tasked with analyzing the ever-evolving technology and presenting to the brass in Brussels next month. “Some bullshit.”

“Uh-huh. Makes sense. They call a Major on leave over the weekend for bullshit.” I don’t know where Dad stands with regard to our country’s military, our foreign policy, or even politics in general. Frankly, I don’t care. But I do love serving. Do we make mistakes? Of course we do. But only people who do nothing don’t make mistakes. And doing nothing in this world is not an option.

“So… what did they really call you for? Come on, you can tell your old man. Gimme a least a little something.”

I take another sip of the whiskey. “That why you’re trying to get me drunk?”

He guffaws. “I wouldn’t even try to make you say something you shouldn’t.”

I rub my face. “Some analysis they need.”

He grunts. That’s all he’s going to get from me. “What does that mean for you?”

It means pretty fucking great things. “I dunno yet.”

“Might wanna think through it before push comes to shove.”

I run my hand over my stubble. “Yeah.”

“Would that put you in more danger?”

Danger in this day and age is relative. There’s cut and dried frontline danger. And then there’s the shit that happens even here, on US territory, where we’re supposed to be safe. The real hold up for me is different. “It’d mean living in Europe.”

“Which you already are.”

“I was. I left Germany. I was hoping for stateside this time.”

“Right.”

I’m thinking about Grace, lying in bed right now, her fucking key probably back under the stupid rock, and I feel the urge to be by her side and protect her.

“Wouldn’t you do better work in Europe? Be more of service to your country?”

Probably. “It’s more about… the accomplishment.” The NATO job would be a huge promotion, especially at my age. There’s a reason I’m being considered for it. I’m good at what I do. Really good. “Other guys can do it.” And it’s true. There are other people as qualified as I am—thank god for that. But they’re older, they have families, demands. It’s more of a headache to move them around. More expensive. Me? I’m as flexible as they come.

Dad reaches for his glass and finishes it. “’Course they can. The real question is, where are your priorities now? What do you want from life?”

A dull pain churns in my stomach. Nights like this remind me of my time in the tree house, with Grace. Life ahead of us. I thought I had it all figured out. We’d be a family someday—soon. I’d be able to provide for everyone.

“Did uh… Did Grace ever tell you why she came back to Emerald Creek?”

I’m surprised that Dad’s thoughts are on Grace as well, although I suppose I shouldn’t be. He has to know where my hesitation comes from. “She got divorced,” I say, as it’s the most obvious thing. Isn’t that why? Why is he asking me? “Right?”

“You’re asking me?”

“No. You’re asking.”

“Just… just making sure… You know what?” He waves in front of him as if to erase his words. “Forget I even asked.”

“What the fuck, Dad? You do know we’re adults, right.”

“This has nothin’ to do with what Dennis… said. Back in the day.”

Right. So what does it have to do with? “If there’s something I should know, you better tell me.”

“Absolutely not. Anything you need to know, you should find out on your own. Innit your job anyway?”

Seriously? “Holy fucking… just hand me the bottle.”

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