Page 131 of Return To You

Looking after Grace for you. Get your ass back here.

I click on the right-pointing arrow to start the video he’s sending, sick in my stomach that something might have happened to Grace.

Instead, I see a close-up of her laughing. The video pans out and swipes to the right. She’s on her deck, sitting at a table that’s new to me, Colton next to her with Skye on his lap. Next to him is Autumn, then Chloe, an empty chair (presumably Justin’s), Haley, and Kiara. They’re laughing and talking together, oblivious to the fact that Justin is filming them. The video finishes on Justin’s face, and a “Miss you, asshole” that punches me hard.

Miss you too. All of you. So damn much.

I start the video again and stop it on Grace. There’s a soft glow about her, a strong happiness, when she’s surrounded by her friends and family. It’s not just the way she’s smiling wide at something Colton is telling Skye. Not just her rust-colored T-shirt and how it flatters her complexion. Not just the way her gold earrings reflect the flickering candlelight. It’s something deep, and profound, and stable, that emanates from her.

A sense of home.

I want to be there. I want to be part of those who make her so happy. So fulfilled. And I want to be on the receiving end of her happy too.

I’m jealous. Fuck yeah, I’m jealous of this.

I hit the call button.

forty-one

Grace

Day 11 Love Note:

Sexiest thing you do #2

The way you purr—like a kitten, but softer

I’m at the spa when my phone rings with Ethan’s ringtone. Specifically, on the deck with Ms. Angela who wants a repeat of the wellness day I organized for the Golden Girls. She cocks an eyebrow and starts saying, “You should get that,” but I’m already back inside, ducking for the break room.

“Ethan!” I half screech, half whisper. My heartbeat is out of control, my palms sweaty. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, babe. Just sort of… out of it. Been stuck inside for days, working on shit.”

I look out the window, at the lush green trees swaying in the breeze, the birds hopping from branch to branch, the thin stripes of clouds gently marring the deep blue sky. “That doesn’t sound healthy. I’m sorry.”

“How are you?”

I miss you like crazy. When are you coming home? “I’m doing good. Nothing much new over here. Daisy was in town a couple of days ago, eating the flower baskets in front of the library. Logan and Hunter managed to wrangle her and take her back home.”

His strangled laugh makes me smile. “Wrangle her?”

“Like two legit cowboys. Rope and all. Logan was riding Sunshine, Hunter was on a BMX. You should have seen them.” I laugh at the memory of Ethan’s two younger brothers coaxing their runaway cow to come back to the farm. “Honestly, I think it was Sunshine who convinced Daisy it wasn’t worth the trouble.” The horse was whinnying softly, and you could tell Daisy was paying attention. It was the cutest thing to see, but I don’t want to lay it too thick on Ethan that he’s missing so much of life’s daily pleasures by dealing with the world’s bigger problems.

Someone has to deal with those big problems so the rest of us can continue leading our simple, almost worry-free lives.

We talk for a bit, but I can tell he’s exhausted. “I’m going to catch some shut-eye, beautiful. Not sure when I’ll be calling again.”

I don’t ask him when he’s coming back.

Day 12 Love Note:

Sexiest Thing You Do #1

Sleeping naked in my jersey

As of now, there are only two envelopes left in the jar. One green and one pink.

Day 13 Love Note:

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