Page 68 of My Shy Alpha

“Nothing in the world is perfect. Believe me, I’d know.”

Fair enough. Then as long as we can work with your wolf, I’ll show you the ropes. Otherwise, just keep being your sweet Omega self.

“And if I’m pregnant? How would you feel?”

Noah’s warm, fluffy paws fall still, resting on my sides. His hesitation makes my gut churn.

Is this where things finally come crashing down? Just like I’m used to?

I know Noah says otherwise, but with everything I’ve been through, I feel like it’s naive to trust anything this good. We’re bound to have a blowout eventually, aren’t we?

Noah studies me intently. I swallow hard, nervously combing his fur.

“I-it’s not too late for me to take the morning-after pill. Maybe I should, just so there’s less uncertainty,” I say.

Noah’s left ear flicks back. It doesn’t work well on Lycans - along with most other medications. Our metabolism is too high.

“Well, that explains my whole life.”

You probably need higher doses of everything like me, but since you’re part human, I don’t know how much higher. I’d be worried about either under- or overdosing you and giving you complications.

“But I’m also supposed to start my period in the next few days. I’m not sure I could get pregnant in the first place. Or does going into heat mean I could?”

Not necessarily. It’s also possible to have a spur-of-the-moment, hormonal heat if your mate riles you up.

I bite back my smile. “Oh. Well, I was pretty... excited by you.”

Noah’s tail thwacks the ground again, fluttering my heart. Sweet Omega, I’m not meaning to avoid your question about possibly being pregnant. I’m just having a hard time figuring out what I’m missing. I thought we cleared it up already.

My heart drops. “Oh, God. I guess I am obsessing about this and didn’t realize... but... um...”

I don’t know what to say. How to explain, or if I need to. There’s no indication that Noah understood what Jenny meant earlier about my disorder.

That’s not all that scares me. I worked tirelessly with Jenny for years, some days sleeping off exhaustion from retraining my brain to function in daily life. And before I progressed in my treatment this year, I really couldn’t function. Everything terrified me, leading me down a path where I was afraid I’d destroy everyone around me or destroy myself. Jenny explained I’ll likely have minor setbacks for the rest of my life, but I never want to be back in that mental space.

Either way, I’ll have to tell Jenny I’m relapsing from multiple triggers in a row - accidentally letting compulsions slip through and worsening their intensity.

Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to explain yourself. Noah boops my cheek with his giant, wet nose, soaking half my face. I just don’t like to plan too far ahead anymore. My life has derailed too many times.

I deflate, still drying my face with my sleeve. “I know exactly what you mean.”

But I already know we’ll figure it out if the time comes, even if I don’t know how just yet. I’ll support you if you’re pregnant, no matter what you want to do about it.

I mentioned it first, yet I’m so flustered that I can’t speak. Noah means every damn word; our bond adds transparency to our conversations that I’ve never had with another partner.

I need to work on this in therapy. He’s completely smitten, and I’m not used to it. I don’t want to keep accusing him based on other people’s behavior. With Noah, I finally might be able to enjoy myself. To keep feeling this freedom. I don’t want to ruin that.

My heart flutters, feeling more and more whole the longer he gazes at me. I hold Noah’s snout steady before leaning in to kiss his wet, huffing nose. Noah’s tail hits the ground so hard that my whole body vibrates.

Suddenly, I’m body-slammed with hundreds of pounds of excited fluff.

My mate. His wolf play-growls, and I burst into squealing laughter.

“Noah?! Don’t crush your mate before you mark her!”

He gives an excited yip, licking the back of my head until my hair is in shambles.

By the time I can escape him, his eyes are wild and I’m breathless with laughter.

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