Page 82 of The Un-Apparent Heir

“Stop it,” Lucy groaned.

“Move back here.”

“I dare not. Winston will leave me. He’ll divorce me and take our children away. You think I am kidding, but I’m not.”

“I cannot believe he would do that for as long as he held a candle for you. He waited. He’s inarticulate, perhaps. Lord knows I am! But he needs to know what you need. Men are dense.”

“Not all men. Patrick is perceptive.”

“I’m a pig who doesn’t understand subtlety. Winston may be, too.”

Lucy smiled and shook her head. “Winston isn’t a pig. He’s just in his little world. We both want the best for the children but disagree on what that means.”

“He needs to get his head out of his arse. If their mother is hurting this much, she’s not going to be doing anything for them. Lucy, the boys need to see you happy. Otherwise, they will grow up thinking that women are just around to pad their egos and fix their lives for them.”

“What, like I did for you for five years?”

“Ouch! Fair but I did love you, Lucy. You are correct in that I let you fix everything, but I always had love for you.”

“So, I should return to be your fixer?”

“You should return to run the whole show as Natalie’s general—the way Rita runs things for Mum and Dad as smoke and mirrors. That is what you are best at.”

“So I can be gone ten hours a day?”

“Isn’t that what you love, though? And wouldn’t you have all the negotiating power to spend less time? The boys would be proud of their mother for having an important job. Seeing that makes them better men. Winston is trying to replicate what he thought was beautiful about his childhood.”

“It was a beautiful childhood. He’d know. Mine was torture.”

“He sees it with rose-coloured glasses. Rita suffocated. She was fucking miserable—she’d say that if you asked. He’s chasing a dream. If you can wake him up, he will see reality and realise he’s losing the best thing in his life. Breaking your heart is… it feels fucking terrible. I would tell him that.”

Lucy shook her head again.

“He needs to recognise that he can’t just pull you around. He holds all the cards.”

“Your self-awareness hasn’t improved?” Lucy asked.

“No. It has. This is why I can say I am sorry I hurt you and that you felt abandoned by the one person who swore they would take care of you. I didn’t and that’s on me. But that’s not on Winston.”

“I should have taken care of me. I should never have quit my job. I failed both times to stand up for myself—with you in a big way and now him. I trusted Winston and lost. I fell in love and lost my mind, but it won’t work this time. I know better..”

“Don’t say that,” George said.

“What, Georgie? It’s the fucking truth. I can only trust myself.”

“That’s a bleak way to look at it, Lucy. You love him, don’t you?”

“I loved you, too. It’s foolish.”

“Lucy, don’t cast Winston in the same light. He’s misguided. You’re unfulfilled. Trusting someone is essential to loving them. I am sorry I left you with this abandonment complex. I see it now but I’m asking you please, Luce, just give my cousin a second chance to get his head out of his arse.”

“What is the difference then?”

“Because you are Winston’s moon and stars. There has never and will never be anyone else, Lucy. He fought me over you and was willing to drag me through the mud to treat you properly. You’re not just a trophy he’s willing to discard. For what it’s worth, I didn’t see you that way, either. However, I always loved Patrick even as I loved you. And… while I could love you both, that wasn’t fair to you. You’re a monogamist. I realised I honestly wasn’t. I had so many reckonings much later in life than most do. You were just collateral in me finding myself. For that, I’m sorry. But while Patrick and I work well, I never would have been the man you deserved and needed.”

“Really?” Lucy was surprised. “Are you saying… you two aren’t…”

She couldn’t even say it. George and Patrick had averyinteresting relationship. George was right. That wouldn’t have worked for her.

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