Page 55 of The Un-Apparent Heir

They walked down the beach a bit. The baby fussed. Sanne did her best to latch him in the sling. That was a new skill she hadn’t quite nailed.

“Here,” Elisabeth held the baby’s head, gently positioning him. “There you are. He knows what to do now.”

And he did.

“You must trust he will grow up as he needs to, Sanne. And that you will, too. The thing about being a parent is, you are progressively teaching them to live by themselves. It sometimes hurts as they grow because you feel like you lose a little bit of them. Then, someday, you wake up and look at the grown-up they have become, and you can only swell with pride. Life goes fast. Each stage is challenging. Today, it’s just getting him to latch. I swear tomorrow he will be off to school. Don’t waste it by sheltering here. You have a husband and a life to live. Make the best of it.”

Sanne wiped tears and nodded. “I just want him to stay this little and precious forever.”

“You will but he won’t. No matter what you do. And if you spend your life worrying about a stage ending, you’ll never enjoy the one you’re in, min skat.”

Sanne looked towards the house to see a face. Paul stood waving.

“Well, Pappa has returned!” Elisabeth patted the baby’s head. “That was fast.”

“He hasn’t slept at all,” Sanne said. “God, why did he do this?”

“I think because he’d rather sleep here with you two than alone back in London. Sanne, he only wants to support you as best he can. Of course, he turned right around.”

They returned. Paul’s face wasn’t happy. He was in shock and putting on a brave face. He gave Sanne a quick kiss and exchanged small talk with Elisabeth.

“Why don’t you two catch up? Take a walk. I’ll change the barnebarn,” Elisabeth doted.

“Oh… okay,” Sanne handed the baby and his sling over.

Elisabeth took him inside and Paul stared, unsure what to say.

“Let’s walk. The fresh air will do me good.”

“How did you get home?” Sanne asked, taking his hand and following him down the way.

“Security escort with George. And they’re going to continue following us.”

Sanne turned back to see PPOs.

“But we don’t get them. Why now? Is there a threat?”

“I didn’t ask for them. I didn’t want them. I didn’t have a choice.”

Confused, Sanne followed Paul to shore. Paul sat, toes in the water. Sanne joined. They sat, looking over the waves. The sun continued to dip below the clouds. Paul squeezed Sanne’s hand.

“Sanne, I love you. And I’m so sorry. I am broken up over Hannah. I know you want to stay here. I know you need to be back here and you hate London?—”

“I don’t hate it.”

“It’s not your place. It’s not mine. I was hoping, selfishly, that we could move here, stay here. And… we can momentarily, but… this is not a long-term thing. And life is forever changed.”

“Well, yes. Loss and a baby?—”

“Loss like you would not believe,” Paul’s voice was spacey.

Sanne looked at him, waiting for what he said next on pins and needles.

“Sanne, my love, I have dreadful news. And I can only blame myself for how you will feel.”

“What? Paul, just fucking say it.”

“Natalie and Ed will never have children. They all wanted to wait to tell us this until Keir was older. They didn’t want to give this news now—not like this—but it was why travelling with Keir was forbidden and why if I’m here, Natalie cannot be.”

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