Page 53 of The Un-Apparent Heir

“She wasn’t allowed to. George, do not make this about you!” Vanna said sharply. “This is deeply painful for the two of them. Moreover, they’ve had to hide it for the past two months—and now more—because they wanted to give Paul and Sanne time to soak up their new baby. Which was beyond thoughtful, but is now quite complicated.”

“Shit,” George said. “There has to be something you can do. You’re a straight couple.”

“George, stop,” Patrick said. “Leave them be. If they say they can’t--“

George’s voice broke, “Well, if we can, they can, right? Right, Ed?”

“Unfortunately, no. And it’s all on me—not Nat—but damn if she hasn’t struggled. We both have. It was the end of the line. She could have died from the fertility drugs. Of nearly 20 eggs, only 3 turned into embryos, none survived. Not one. The only option we would have had was to use a sperm donor.”

“But she can’t,” Patrick said. “Fuck, Ed, I’m so sorry.”

“Thanks. This is very painful for us, but… Natalie wants to take care of everyone. She feels responsible for Paul’s pain. Telling him no last night… that she couldn’t fly them… was painful.”

“I wish he would have rang me,” George said.

“You’d been drinking. You wouldn’t have been helpful,” Robbie said. “Don’t you think I thought of that, Georgie?”

“Stop sniping, All of you! I am swimming in testosterone!” Vanna said. “It is unhelpful. Natalie is in hell, as are Paul, and Sanne! That poor woman! And all you can do is whinge, Robbie! No. Stop it! You know better.”

Vanna stood, hands still on the table. She stared at the other end where her husband sat.

Voice sharp, she declared, “If Sanne loses her mother, I will attend the funeral in your stead. Ed will go with me. I know you and Natalie cannot, but it will break Sanne and Paul if we do not show up for them. And I cannot for the life of me think of a time I would need a sign of solidarity more than after just having a baby and losing a parent.”

Robbie, intelligently, said nothing in disagreement.

“I am okay with that,” Ed agreed. “Glad to join you, Vanna.”

“Good. I don’t suspect Hannah has long. We will make arrangements when we know more. George, in the meantime, just… take care of them when you get back there.”

“I will, Mummy,” George agreed.

“Now, I am going to go take care of my baby before she loses her fucking mind,” Vanna said, leaving and also slamming the door.

“Dad, I think it is best if you just… say no more on this topic,” George said.

“Yes, I think so as well. I won’t argue with her. Neither of you are expendable, but my wife is probably right. We must show up for them right now. I will drop the matter. I’m not angry, I’m heartbroken—for Paul, for Sanne, for Ed and Natalie. The whole world is closing in right now. I would love for it to look differently,” Robbie said.

Silently, Ed agreed.

13

MOVING ON

Sanne lost her mother five weeks to the day after her son was born, but that wasn’t her greatest challenge. She never said goodbye to her mother. Instead, she held her hand as she slipped away. A drunk driver took a beloved mother, a grandmother, and a wife far too soon. And there was nothing Sanne could do but watch her mother scream, her sister sob, and her niece try to grapple with death for the first time. She could only hold her baby and hope things got better.

While Robbie and Natalie could not attend the celebration of life that Sanne and her sister planned for Hannah, the rest of the family did. George and Patrick were as present as ever. They helped with the children while Linnea and Sanne made arrangements. Vanna held Elisabeth’s hand. Ed did whatever he could to assist. Kiersten and Olav flew in from Norway. They entertained Sanne’s mother, giving her yet another set of people to translate. Elisabeth faded into her mother tongue off and on, as if unable to cope or keep things straight. Kiersten and her Norwegian fiancé became invaluable in translation.

A week later, everyone left. Again, the silence was deafening. Sanne was left with a new baby in her home country. Paul was on borrowed time. And all Sanne wanted to do—needed to do—was take care of her mother, sister, and niece. The pull to return to London wore on her. No one asked for this—yet, she knew it was implicit they should not remain in the U.S. Still, it was hard to believe Robbie would ask them to return knowing what it was like to lose a parent at a similar age and with a young child.

When the call came, Paul had to return.

For the longest time since he was born, Sanne left Keir with her mother to drive Paul to the airport. Driving home, she cried the entire way. Paul would be gone for a few days. He needed to arrange for them to stay in the U.S. long enough to wrap things up. Sanne didn’t want to return.

When she returned from dropping him, she attached Keir to her body like a barnacle. She was unwilling to let him go. This continued for a day. Paul met with his father, said very little, and planned to head back to his wife and child.

“You cannot just stay like this all day, Sanne,” Elisabeth said.

Sanne sat on the family room couch, holding Keir close as ever.

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