Page 65 of Whispers of Redemption

She didn’t look back at him as her long legs strode decisively toward the start of the Bluff Trail.

Man, she wasn’t going to make this easy.

“Can I join you?” he said.

“It’s a free country,” she threw over her shoulder.

He caught up to her and they started the steep climb. The Bluff Trail was one of Wade’s favorites. It was short, only about three miles round trip, but it opened up to a bluff about four hundred feet above Lake Michigan and offered a spectacular view of the water.

Afternoon sunlight dappled the dirt path as they climbed beneath a canopy of leafy trees and fragrant pine. The trail leveled out and they walked along a couple of small islands connected by footbridges. Birdsong and the deep base twang of bullfrogs floated on the air around them. Then they were climbing again, winding between patches of open and wooded sand dunes. They kept a fast pace, and they were both breathing hard by the time they reached the bluff. The golden sand of the dunes glowed as the sun slanted across them, presenting a postcard perfect view that included the lake in the distance.

They had hiked in complete silence. Wade didn’t attempt talking to her as they stood side by side, taking it all in. The sun was just beginning its drop toward the horizon, igniting the blue-green waves with pinpoints of light.

After several long moments, still looking out at the view, he said, “Cassie, I’m truly sorry. You were right about me. I do try too hard to control situations. And I know I can get ridiculous with my rules and checklists.” He ran a hand through his hair, making the honey-gold curls stand on end. “It’s just that I’ve done it for so long it’s become an ingrained part of me.”

He could feel her glance at him, but she didn’t speak, and he continued.

“After my mom died, we all felt so lost. It was like my brothers, my dad, and I had dropped into a nightmare that was completely out of our control. My mother was the glue of our family. And I don’t think any of us realized how much until she was gone. I know my dad was hurting, but so were all of us. I was angry at him for abandoning us, emotionally withdrawing from us, the way he did. And I was frustrated that he was more interested in taking care of his business than taking care of us the way he should have. That’s when I realized it was up to me. I could take care of my brothers. And I knew if we were going to survive as a family, we needed order and routine, like we’d had when my mom was alive. So, I created that order. And I learned to rely on my rules to help keep us all safe and on track.”

He finally turned and looked at her. “Does that make sense?”

She was quiet for a long moment, then finally, “Yes, it does.”

A few more moments of silence passed. Then she said, “Wade, I’m sorry, too. I know I overreacted. I guess you’re not the only one who’s a little messed up from their childhood.” One corner of her mouth lifted in a small, lopsided smile. “For most of my life, the only person I could trust was me. Growing up, I had literally no control over what happened to me or where I ended up. So, I guess I was hyper-sensitive to Ani’s situation, and I wanted to respect her wish to maintain the little bit of control that she did have.”

Wade nodded. “I can see that.”

“Plus, now that I’m out on my own, and can finally control my own destiny, I’m used to handling things myself. I feel like nobody is going to look out for me and mine like I can. So, I get defensive when anyone else tries to operate in my world. And Ani is a big part of my world.”

“I was only trying to help,” he said softly. “And do the right thing.”

“I know.” She took a deep breath and smiled at him. “And I also know that if Wade Riley does anything, it’s going to be the right thing.”

He grinned back. “Are we good then?”

“Yeah,” she said. “We’re good.”

Angel was busy sniffing at a cluster of wildflowers as they stood, fully facing each other now, the view forgotten. The air was a little cooler than it had been down below. Dune grass rippled near their feet. And soft, tendrils of her russet hair had escaped the ponytail to float on the light breeze that now washed over them. He reached out to tame them, his pulse pounding. Now was the time. He needed to say the rest of what he wanted to tell her. But the words seemed to stick in his throat.

They stood together this way as time extended, then grew awkward. Her gaze dropped. “It’s getting late, we’d better head back.”

And with that, the moment was lost.

She turned to lead the way back down the trail, with him following in her wake, silently berating himself.

He’d just had the perfect opportunity to take that next step. To tell her how he really felt about her, that he loved her. And he’d let it just pass right on by. Coward! Now she was chattering on about something in her psychology class and he was barely listening. In all honesty, though, he knew what had stopped him. It had been a sudden surge of fear that she didn’t feel the same way. But he also knew that if he didn’t tell her, he’d regret it. They began their final descent and within moments, they were back in the parking lot standing beside her car as she unlocked the door.

All right, Riley. Say it now. You’ve got a second shot at this. He cleared his throat. “Uh...Cassie?”

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