Page 21 of Somewhere Between Falling

A woman, who I could only assume was Blair’s best friend and the host of this shindig, got everyone’s attention to begin the party, so Dad went to join Blair. They opened gifts and played a few really embarrassing games, like ‘guess the melted candy bar’ that was meant to look like baby feces in a diaper—who ever thought that that would be an appropriate game?.

As I watched his easy laughter, I was struck by how happy he looked. I couldn’t recall a time when he looked so completely joyful. It pierced a hole in my heart, but I wasn’t sure if I was sadder for me or for him for the years he spent missing this kind of happiness in his life.

I was just getting ready to sneak out when my dad stopped me.

“I’m honestly impressed you lasted this long,” he said with a chuckle.

“Yeah, I have a lot of homework.” It was a terrible excuse, and I was sure he saw right through me.

“I wanted to talk to you about something before you go,” he said. “Blair and I would really like you to be in the room when Henry is born.”

“Henry?” I paused before realization hit. “Oh, her baby.”

“Yes, we finally found a name we both like.” He smiled proudly. “Anyway, it would really mean a lot to us if you’re there.”

“I don’t know, Dad. I really don’t have any interest in witnessing the miracle of childbirth…Besides, shouldn’t it be a private time for your family?” My words bit like ice, but really, what did he expect?

“You are my family.” There was a note of sadness in his voice which made me immediately regret the comment, but I couldn’t bring myself to apologize for it.

“You know what I meant.”

He sighed. “Think about it, okay? It would really mean a lot to us.”

I wanted to tell him that I didn’t care if it would mean a lot to either of them. They obviously didn’t care when they decided to break up my family, so why should I care about the start of theirs?

But instead, I said, “I’ll think about it.”

Even though, truthfully, I knew I wouldn’t give it another thought. The way I looked at it, I was here at the shower. That was more involved in their new life together than I ever intended on being.

I checked my phone to see if Alex texted yet and was surprised to see I missed one from Tobias: How’s the baby shower?

I texted back: Cutesy decor, disgusting games

He responded: Sounds like a good time. Did you check the weather for tomorrow?

No, I’m not a middle-aged man. I chuckled a little to myself, imagining his expression.

I’m going to ignore that insult and tell you that it’s supposed to snow. A lot.

It did feel like it might snow, but I was so used to the trickery of the Midwest weather that I hadn’t given it much thought. Afterall, it was typical for the weather to fluctuate quite a bit this time of year. It could be sixty degrees one day and thirty the next. I remembered one time when I was a kid that it snowed so much that we made this giant snowman in our front yard, and the very next day, the weather was warm enough to wear short sleeves and all the snow around my snowman had melted. I was pretty sure my dad still had the picture of me standing proudly next to my snowman framed in his office.

Unless, of course, it had been replaced by a picture of Blair.

I texted Tobias back: I love snow

He responded quickly: I know. Want to go sledding?

I hadn’t been sledding since I was a kid. I loved it, but as much as I loved sledding, spending time with Tobias outside of academia was even more appealing. Plus, we had decided to be friends now, so before I could chicken out, I quickly responded: Absolutely

Chapter Twelve

While I hadn’t been sledding since I was a kid, I figured it was kind of like riding a bike, so I wasn’t super worried about it. It wasn’t like it was hard to do by any means. You just sat on a sled and slid down a hill. Easy peasy! The worst that could happen would be that I didn’t dress warmly enough. There was nothing worse than being cold, so I made sure to dress in layers. I also packed a change of clothes for afterward since I knew the ride back home would be miserable in the clothes I went sledding in. I guess there was one thing worse than being cold: being wet and cold.

Tobias drove outside of town. I didn’t ask where we were going because I knew he knew how I felt about someone from Parkhurst seeing us. And even though we were ‘just friends,’ I didn’t want to give anyone the opportunity to think it was anything different.

Once we arrived at our destination, he turned off the car and put on his hat and gloves. I did the same after also securing my scarf around my neck. I probably had too many layers on for sledding, but today was the kind of cold that hurt your face so I wanted to be prepared.

“It’s higher than I remembered,” Tobias said uncertainly as he got out of the car.

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