Page 114 of Unleashing Chaos

I smile but I’m aware it doesn’t reach my eyes. “Thank you, Mother.”

She sits next to me on the bench. “Darling, are you all right? I know this isn’t how you expected things to go. Everything changed so fast.”

I can’t hide the tears in my eyes. “It’s strange to think I’m gaining something today when I’m losing so much. I don’t know how I’m going to do this without you and Father. I’m going to miss you both more than you can ever know.”

“You’ll manage without us. And you’re not alone. Your brothers and Cannon will support you.”

It’s true but it doesn’t mean it feels right.

“I miss him, Mama,” I murmur, calling her the name I haven’t used since I was a little girl.

“Miss who?”

She knows, she always knows. But that doesn’t mean she’ll spare me from speaking my feelings. My mother has never let us hide from our emotions. No matter how painful the subject, she always coaxed it out of us. As soon as the words were said, my brothers and I felt a million times better. She always knew best, and she still does.

“Jace,” I whisper, the word barely a breath on the tip of my tongue.

Placing her index finger beneath my chin, she lifts my face to hers. “Then why are you tethering your forever to Cannon? He’s a nice man and very handsome, but you love another.”

I shake my head and try to look away from her, but she won’t let me. She has more strength in one finger than I do in my whole body. I have no choice but to answer.

“Because he doesn’t love me in return. I thought he did. And maybe, somewhere inside him, in his own way, he does. But he won’t allow himself to express it. I gave him a hundred chances to come with me. But he let me go. And Cannon agrees that what we have is platonic. He’s a great friend and wants to stand by my side.” I shrug. “I figured if I can’t have a sweeping love story like you and Father, I might as well have the friendship of a lifetime.”

“Oh, Desideria.”

My mother pulls me into her arms, and I can no longer fight back the tears. Just this once I’ll let myself cry for what could have been. If only I’d come into Jace Wilder’s life earlier. If only he wasn’t so deeply hurt. If only I was enough to heal him. Unfortunately, I’m another casualty in the wreckage he refuses to leave behind.

She runs her palm over my back and remains silent for several minutes, just letting me cry. I fight through that pain, battling it tooth and nail only to face another. My father is deteriorating and my time with him is quickly coming to an end. Like every epic love story, my mother will follow him, leaving my brothers and me to rule in their stead. I’ve always thought that it was strange how eternal partners follow each other into the In-Between. Until now. Now I understand why it would hurt too much to carry on without the one you love more than anyone else.

Finally, when I sit up and take a deep breath, she runs her fingertips under my eyes and smiles. “Thank Lilith for waterproof mascara, hmm?” I can’t help but smile and she rubs her thumb over my cheek. “There’s my strong girl. I know this isn’t exactly what you want right now, but Cannon is your best friend, yes?”

I nod and sniffle, pushing my hair back into place. “Besides Jace, yeah.”

“Time is a funny thing. It can help friendships bloom into love. All hope for your love story isn’t lost. Your prince charming may be a different character than you thought.”

“I know. I just wish you and Father would be here to guide me through all the new chapters.”

“Me too, my sweet girl.”

I get to my feet and smooth my dress, holding my arms out to my sides. “Well? Am I ready to be bonded?”

My mother nods and comes to face me. “You are the last piece of the puzzle, the final working part to make all this function the way it should. Your father will feel so much relief when he can finally let you all assume your roles. Thank you, Desideria.”

I lean forward and kiss her cheek. “I’m ready to do my part, and I thank you both for letting me go find someone I’ll enjoy spending eternity with. Even though it isn’t true love, Cannon and I have a lot of fun together.”

“Good. That’s half of an eternal partnership right there.”

A soft knock taps at the door and my mother glances at the clock on her bedside table. “Ah, it’s nearly time. That must be Cannon.”

My heart speeds up at the mention of his name, and I’m not even sure why. I still have this fear that he’s going to change his mind or demand something more from me, even though that would be out of character. My nerves are ruling my mind, though, so common sense is taking a backseat.

“All right.” I turn toward the door and clasp my hands in front of my abdomen. “Let him in.”

With a nod my mother strides to the massive black door and swings it open, and with a peck on the cheek and a whispered exchange with Cannon, she disappears, and he enters, closing the door behind him.

He looks handsome in his black suit and bow tie. His hair is twisted into small spirals and his blue eyes are striking against his brown skin. He flashes me a wide grin and says, “You look amazing, Desi.”

All my nerves melt away. This is my best friend; someone I can trust. I walk toward him and turn all the way around so he can see the whole dress. “Yeah? It’s not too much?”

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