Page 95 of Unleashing Chaos

And with that, he loses control. But this is more than sex, more than fucking. Yes, it’s hard, fast, and rough. It is the intense joining of two bodies seeking the most basic kind of pleasure. But it’s so much more. It’s heightened emotions—a need to convey everything words cannot. It feels good—damn, does it feel good—but this moment is more than physical. This is a sacrament . . . it’s spiritual.

Jace glides his hand between us and presses his thumb to my clit. “Come on, little hurricane. I want you to unleash that chaos inside you and rip me apart.”

Jace Wilder means to make good on his promise to make me scream because when he pushes deeper inside me and pinches my clit, his name flows from my lips in an animalistic cry. The orgasm that rips through me is sudden, hard, and almost painfully intense. Wave after wave racks my body, my muscles tensing, legs shaking, stars flashing in front of my eyes.

And he doesn’t ease up. He tightens his hold around my neck and leans over, closing his lips over mine in a kiss that takes every bit of breath that I have left.

“Fuck,” he grunts through gritted teeth.

Jace shudders above me while he pulsates and fills me in a way I never knew was possible. It isn’t just his release pouring into my body, but an overwhelming joy that runs soul deep. And as he thrusts into me for the final time, I know this moment will leave the most beautiful scar on my heart. I’ll never forget when he was fully mine, and I gave myself completely to him.

With his mouth pressed to mine, he loosens his grip on my neck and rolls over, taking me with him, tucking me into his side. All the raw need is sedated for now, and he showers me with sweet, tentative kisses.

“Are you all right? I wasn’t too rough, was I?”

I snuggle against him and shake my head. “I’m perfect. You were perfect.” Running my fingertips down the center of his chest, I let them drift over his pecs and trace the scar from the wound that nearly claimed his life.

“Jace?”

“Hmm?” His lips are against my temple, and I’m so distracted by the way they feel on my skin that I nearly lose my train of thought.

“Are you going to miss me when I’m gone? All of me? Like, even my laundry when I leave it in the dryer too long and it’s all wrinkly. Or when I forget and leave my blanket unfolded on the couch. Or when you’re watching Star Wars and I’m not there to do my amazing R2-D2 impression.”

“Yes, Desideria. I’ll miss you. And all your little chaotic additions to my house,” he teases. “It’s been a long time since I’ve let myself get this close to someone, and it’ll be hard to say goodbye.”

I swallow over the lump in my throat and force the tears back. “Me too. I’ve never trusted someone like I trust you.” I slide my hand up into his hair and rub my thumb along his jaw. “I want to spend every second I can with you before I go. Is that—” My voice cracks. “Is that okay?”

His gray eyes search mine and so quietly I almost don’t hear it he says, “Yes. That’s what I want too.”

I’m torn in two by his confession. The upcoming weeks will give me more time to have moments like this with him. I’ll get to curl up in his arms and tell him everything I want him to hear. I won’t waste a minute. And when the time comes for me to leave, a gaping hole will run through my heart. I’ll understand what it is to lose someone I love.

Twenty-nine

DESI

“I told you it was going to be cold by the bay,” Jace says as he turns to me and slides the ticket for the ferry into the front pocket of my jeans. I can’t take it because my hands are currently shoved into the sleeves of my jacket.

“I know, but the wind is frigid!” I say through chattering teeth as he wraps his arm around me and leads me into the throng of tourists boarding the boat that will take us to the Statue of Liberty. It’s the first stop on our tour of slightly clichéd but necessary attractions in New York City. Of all the things on the list, this is the one I’m the most excited to see.

We step onto the ferry and instead of heading to one of the benches under the protective awning, Jace and I keep walking until we reach the far end of the boat. I place my hands on the railing, and he cages me in with his arms on either side of me. I savor the warmth radiating from his body, letting every muscled inch of him chase away the chill.

It’s sunny today, and the rays reflecting off the water of New York Bay create a sparkling effect, making it look much warmer than it is. But the statue sitting in the distance is worth the cold air, and so is the man behind me.

“This is beautiful,” I murmur, my eyes scanning the horizon, the midmorning wind whipping my hair across my face.

Jace doesn’t answer right away, and I glance up to find him studying my face. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” I ask.

“I’ve seen the statue before, but I’ve never seen you so captivated with something. You’re breathtaking.”

I turn all the way around to face him and brush my windblown hair from my eyes, but it’s stubborn and keeps flying back across my face. “You say the nicest things to me, you know that?” I giggle, and when he cocks his head to the side, I say, “I was just thinking about how we used to be such assholes to each other all the time.”

His arms slip around my waist, pulling me close. “I think you kind of like my asshole side. It can always make an appearance again if you want.”

I raise my brows and press myself flush against him. “Actually, I think it’s sexy when you’re all dominant and tough. What about you? Did you like my bitchy side, Wilder?”

“Yes, but I enjoy all of your sides.” He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. “Particularly your sweet and sexually needy ones.”

From across the bay, the Statue of Liberty looks so small, but standing at its base with my head craned back, I realize how very wrong I was. Even the sculptures of Lucifer and Lilith in Infernis aren’t as impressive.

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