Page 105 of Unleashing Chaos

Damn, what I wouldn’t give for that to be possible.

“Your family is counting on you and the energies who crave your type of chaos need you too. I would never ask you to give up that calling. You were made to be a queen, not a girl who spends her days with a nerd who plays video games and makes cool graphic art.”

“I know I have to take my place on the throne, but I just needed you to hear me; if it were possible, it would be enough for me, Jace.”

I place two soft kisses on her lips. I hope that those kisses say the words I can’t: if my heart were bandaged and on the mend, we wouldn’t be saying goodbye right now. We’d be packing our books and movies and clothing in boxes together and despite whatever lingering doubts I might have, I wouldn’t be so broken that I couldn’t even try.

I’ve never cursed time the way I do now. “Just tell me I can be enough for you for one more night, Desideria,” I whisper against her temple.

She turns her head so she can look at me when she says, “You’ve always been enough for me, Jace. Even more so tonight.”

The force with which I pin her to the soft blanket beneath us leaves her breathless. Taking both of her wrists in one hand, I hold them above her head and whisper, “How do you want me to show you how much I’ll miss your presence in my life, Desideria?” I run my free hand down her face, tracing her cheekbone with the utmost reverence. I’m going to worship her like she is my personal savior. Because she is. Desideria has kept me afloat these past months. She has been my life support, my anchor, a new reason for me to live a full life.

“Do you want me to show you by being soft? Vulnerable?” Dipping my head to brush my lips against hers, I murmur, “Treat you like a princess?” She relaxes beneath me as my palm slides down and tightens around her throat. “Or rough? Demanding?” I nip her bottom lip and growl, “Like a queen.”

She gasps and wraps her legs around me, pulling me closer. “Like a queen.”

“You want me to leave my mark on you, so you never forget?”

“Even if you took me gently, I’d never forget, Jace.”

I groan and roll my hips over her, my fingers gripping her throat and wrists tighter like she might slip away. She’s so willing to bend to my desires, my willing captive, who craves everything I need to give her.

I release her neck and slide my hand to the hem of her sweatshirt. As my cold fingers brush over her stomach, her skin prickles with goosebumps. Palming her breast, my chilled thumb caresses her nipple.

“Take it off,” she gasps, writhing against my hold on her wrists. “Please. I don’t want anything between us.”

I ease the warm fabric up her torso and watch in awe at how her body responds to the cold air. Sitting back on my legs, I toss her shirt to the side. The light of the fire dances over every soft dip and hill. I return to my task from this morning, sketching every inch of her in my memory. I never want to forget how she looks or the softness of her skin. Her scent will always be my favorite and her taste will leave me forever unsatisfied. She has ruined me to my core, and I’ve never been so happy to be a mess.

“So fucking beautiful,” I whisper.

She sits up and slips her hands under the hem of my T-shirt, and I lift my arms, allowing her to pull it over my head. She doesn’t take her eyes off me as she drops it to the ground next to us. Dragging her fingers up my bare chest, she leans forward, planting a kiss on the scar over my heart, the tough skin that has kept everyone from reaching it.

She lifts her eyes to mine and echoes my words. “So fucking beautiful. Every single inch.”

I reach just beyond the entrance of the tent and scrape my fingers in the snow. I hold her gaze and bring the ball of ice to the tops of her breasts. She arches into my touch as I drag the ice over her skin. Droplets of water run over her nipples and stream down her stomach, glistening like priceless diamonds against her skin.

“Lie down, Desideria, and let me taste the snow on your body.”

She lies back, her hair spilling over her shoulders and onto the pillows. I run my tongue across the swells of her breasts, lapping up the water, down to one hard peak. Her breath catches, a little yelp escaping her throat. I glance up at her and the most wicked thoughts slip inside my head. I know exactly what to do to have her turning to putty in my hands. Sliding one palm up her other breast, I circle her nipple in a slow, tantalizing motion, getting so close, but not quite close enough. She arches her back with each pass of my tongue, offering herself to me. I take and take because she is the only thing I crave.

“Jace,” she whines, tangling her hand in my hair and pulling hard. “Please.”

I deny her . . . for now. Lifting her leg, I remove her boots and fluffy socks. My fingers drift up her thighs and hook into the waistband of her leggings. It’s so tempting to yank them off, but I want to savor the task of undressing her for the final time. Every inch of revealed skin makes my mouth water. I want to lick, suck, and bite until she’s left with my mark on her body.

When she’s naked, one side of my mouth tilts up. My fingers prickle with the need to touch. I want to make her understand without words the ache I feel seeing her like this. Taking another handful of snow, I press it to her sex. I’m captivated by how it melts against her, following all the lines of her body I want to trace with my tongue.

“That’s a pretty sight. So wet and aching for me,” I say.

Her neck stretches and her lips part at the frozen sensation. “Jace, that feels so good.”

I could do this all night just to hear her moan my name. It’s like hearing a song, feminine with a hint of rasp. I’d put it on repeat, losing myself to it over and over again.

“Please, let me make you feel good too,” she begs.

I lean over her and brush her hair behind her ears. “All I need is you close and I’m hard. All the other things like kissing”—I press my lips to hers—“and touching”—my fingertips brush the seam of her—“and fucking, I do to watch you get wet. Knowing it’s because of me that you’re turned on makes me feel good.”

She places her hand over her heart and her voice is shaky when she says, “You must feel good a lot then, because I’m always wet when you’re around. You’ve ruined your fair share of my panties, Jace Wilder.”

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