Page 109 of Every Beat of My Heart

“The kids like me. So what? All that matters is the administration doesn’t want me, and none of this is going to change that.” I threw the paper onto the table, desperate for everyone to clear out of the apartment so I could go back to wallowing.

“But you can get the girl,” Teddy said with a smile.

“You think this means that I should go after Claire?” It felt as if a piece of me was missing, but I couldn’t get past the fact that I wasn’t the right man for her. I wasn’t good enough.

“She obviously loves you. I don’t understand it. But Owen does too. He said he missed you. He’s confused as to what’s going on.”

“I’ll talk to him, explain that we weren’t meant to be together.” Of anyone, Owen deserved someone who could be a father figure to him.

Dad’s brow furrowed. “But there’s no longer a conflict. You could date her if you wanted to.”

“I’m no good for her,” I repeated, just wanting to sleep for a thousand years.

“Why do you keep saying that?” Teddy asked as he opened my fridge, probably looking for something to eat, which I didn’t have.

He got out some eggs and cracked them directly into the pan I kept on the stove.

“I didn’t say you could stay and cook yourself breakfast.”

He turned on the burner. “I’m cooking you breakfast.”

“You don’t need to do that. I just want to get some sleep.”

“You want to avoid this conversation,” Teddy said.

“Well, yeah. Wouldn’t you? Want to talk about how you feel about Charlotte living in the cottage and helping us out?”

Teddy’s eyes narrowed. “We’re not talking about me.”

“Why do you think you’re not good enough for Claire?” Dad asked.

“For the reasons we already know. I don’t know what I want out of life. I can’t settle on just one job.”

“I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you were less than because you had more interests than your brothers. I should have encouraged you, not pressured you to choose one thing.”

It felt like the air had been sucked out my lungs.

Teddy turned and leaned a hip against the counter, the wooden spoon in his hand. “I should apologize too. We pressured you over the years to fit into some Calloway mold as if there is such a thing. You followed your heart and did what you love. There’s nothing better than that. And if Claire wants you, then she’d be lucky to have you.”

I shook my aching head. “I can’t even understand what’s happening right now.”

“You deserve Claire. You’re obviously a great teacher, coach, and firefighter. There’s nothing you can’t do,” Dad said.

I’d never thought of what I did as a good thing. Holding multiple jobs meant that I was passionate about what I did? It wasn’t wrong or bad? They didn’t want me to be more like them? “I always thought you wanted me to be more like Teddy or Wes.”

Dad shook his head. “Every one of my kids is unique, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. You should do whatever makes you happy.”

I thought back to my time with Claire: throwing a football in her front yard, cooking together, and the few moments we had to ourselves. I loved her and Owen. “I want a life with them. If they’ll have me.”

Teddy raised a brow. “That’s the big question, isn’t it? Did you screw it up beyond repair?”

I grabbed a towel and snapped it in his direction. “I thought you were here to help me.”

“Watch it,” Teddy warned. “I am, but you can be a stubborn ass.”

“No name calling,” Dad chided, the reprimand a remnant from our past.

“We’re not kids anymore. Our actions have repercussions. You pushed Claire away, and you might not get her back.”

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