Page 37 of Captive Heart

Melody swallowed. If she was honest with herself, she could admit that she was curious, too.

What would it feel like to have sex with this man? To choose it for herself and be indulged in a way that had never been forthcoming in the past.

Was that even a thing?

Was there pleasure to be had in an act she had only ever found frighteningly violent or tediously unsatisfying?

Melody frowned. Why did she even want to know?

Was it to prove to herself that there was something more to that kind of intimacy than just being some crudely rutting brute's fuck hole?

Melody drew in a shallow, shaky breath.

She was torn. Men could be vile and depraved; she knew that, to her detriment. But there was some kind of magnetism calling her to reach out and put her hands on Micah.

When he’d allowed her to give him pleasure in the pool, he hadn't hurt her once. He'd been kind and protective and had allowed her to satisfy her curiosity without making demands. Would he let her do more, or would that be pushing things too far?

Despite his explanation, Melody didn't understand his reservation. In her experience, men took what they wanted, whether it was offered or not, so his reactions were confusing.

But he was asleep, and despite his bulk, he didn't look at all scary.

In the end, curiosity won out and she pressed her pale hands against his tanned skin. The difference pleased her, she realised, but her fingernails were ragged and unkempt, and they looked incongruous next to all his bodily perfection. Melody pursed her lips and pushed the thought aside.

His skin felt different when it wasn't wet, smooth and sinuous so that her fingers glided effortlessly across it like satin on satin. She could feel the tensile strength in his bulging muscles and thought she should probably be a little more intimidated, but that was one thing she’d never felt around Micah.

She drew her slim fingers across one side of the delineated vee of muscle that pointed to his pelvis and pulled her bottom lip between her teeth watching in fascination as his stomach tensed and his cock jumped beneath the thin barrier of fabric.

Her fingers itched to plunge beneath the waistband, but just as she tentatively dipped her fingertips beneath the wide band of elastic, a big hand caught hold of her wrist and stopped her.

Melody started. Her eyes flew to Micah’s, and she felt the colour bleed from her face as she saw the query in those sleepy, melted chocolate eyes.

"I-I'm sorry," she stuttered, snatching her hands away and curling them protectively around her torso. "I didn't mean…please…don't beat me!" she begged, her head bowed, and her eyes screwed closed while her body trembled. She’d built him up in her head as something different to the beasts she’d known. She thought it might break her if he proved her wrong.

Micah eased up onto one elbow and reached forward, skating a gentle stroke down Melody's arm. "I am not going to beat you, Melody. Not ever. I've told you that before, remember?"

Melody peered at him from beneath her lashes, her head still lowered.

"Look at me properly," he requested softly, and she slowly raised her head.

"Now, what's going on in that head of yours?" he asked, sitting and drawing the sheet up around his waist.

Melody followed his example and modestly tucked herself beneath the covers.

"I was just curious," she admitted shyly. "And I wanted to give something back, to repay you for everything you've done for me, to show my appreciation."

26

Micah leaned his head back against the headboard and swallowed against the dryness in his throat. He'd already allowed this once.

He couldn't do it again.

Even though it was Melody, herself, who was initiating this intimacy, it still felt too much like he was taking advantage. Just the thought twisted his gut as if he was deliberately defiling her and adding to her abuse.

Melody didn't know what she was offering. She had been conditioned to think that her only value was in how she could serve a man's needs, and he didn't want to be another man who exploited her in such a way. To take what she was offering would be reprehensible, and he would never be able to live with himself.

He'd already gone too far when they'd been in the hydro pool, not wanting her to feel that he'd lied to her about having control and having a choice, but for the sake of his own integrity, he had to draw the line somewhere.

He realised Melody had drawn closer and was pressed up against his side, her fragile looking hand pressed against his chest.

---