Page 31 of Not in Love

After work I’d opened the dating app and scrolled through men’s profiles in search of someone who wasn’t Eli—and then I’d given up without messaging anyone. It had felt wrong on some base, instinctive level, like a nagging prickle that I was forgetting something, like starting a new book before finishing the one already checked out from the library—something truncated that wouldn’t allow me to move on yet.

So I’d moved on to do what I really wanted: to figure out Eli Killgore’s deal. And the research had proven fruitful.

“Did you guys know that Minami Oka has a doctorate in chemical engineering from Cornell?” I asked. “She was at UT at some point, too.”

Tisha gasped. “No shit.”

“Did Eli tell you?” Florence asked, sounding a little alarmed. Maybe at the thought of us exchanging small talk. Or perhaps at the prospect of being invited, three months down the line, to a barefoot, lakeside ceremony in which I’d wed the guy who’d pilfered her life’s work.

She might even be asked to officiate.

“No. I looked it all up online.”

“Was Minami there when we were there?” Tisha asked.

“I’m not sure. UT is listed as a past institution on her profile, but it doesn’t give years.” I glanced at Florence. “Did she overlap with your faculty time there?”

She gave it a good think. “I can’t remember. But it’s a large department, and it’s been years. If she was an undergrad . . . there are so many of them.”

“Too many,” Tisha muttered darkly, clearly flashing back to her TA years.

“Eli seems to know his way around a lab,” I added. Despite having majored in finance at St. Cloud State University. He didn’t list an MBA, which I thought odd. Then again, what did I know about the credentials necessary to start a Pac-Man company whose only purpose was to eat other, yellow-pebbled companies?

“For real?” Tisha was curious.

“More than some of the engineering undergrads I dealt with at UT, for sure.”

“Well. Bars and lows and all that.”

“Rue,” Florence interjected, changing the topic, “anything new on the coating patent front?”

“Still on track to file the application next week.” I gave Florence a small smile. “The agent suggested that I collect a couple new humidity data points. Other than that, we’re doing great.”

Florence’s smile was much brighter. “Let me know if there’s anything you need from me.”

“What about what I need from you?” Tisha asked.

Florence’s eyes widened in concern. “If there’s anything—”

“Nutter Butter in the vending machines. It’s been ages and I’m still waiting.”

I nibbled on my green bean, and while Tish and Florence bickered over the worthiness of various types of snacks, I forced myself to enjoy the rest of the evening.

9

YOU SIMP

ELI

He’d lost his mind earlier that morning, and the results had been a bit of a fuckup.

Or a lot.

When he’d gotten in his car to meet Rue at Kline, he’d not meant to come on to her. But her physical presence in his space was heady, a little hypnotic. The room had been small, and she’d smelled amazing, like the shower she’d just had, and buffer solutions, and something sweet and personal and her underneath it all.

Not Eli’s best moment.

But it was contained now. Her refusal had cooled things enough to knock some sense into him, and he was very relieved not to be tempted to drive to her house just for the privilege of doing something appalling, like . . . staring at her dark balcony windows and ordering himself to not masturbate furiously, probably.