Page 79 of Bi-Partisan

He laughs and brushes his lips on mine just as the timer on his phone goes off. He reaches over and shuts it off. “Come on, we need to get up and moving.”

He rolls off of me and out of the bed, and with a sigh, I follow suit to get ready for the day.

By eight fifteen, we pull up outside Raleigh Union Station. He puts the car in park and turns on the hazards before unbuckling his seat belt and opening his door. I hesitate for a brief moment, but staying in the car won’t delay the inevitable. I unbuckle my own seatbelt, then reach for the door handle, but before I can grab it, the door is already opening from the outside. He ducks down a little and holds out his hand.

I don’t even bother protesting that I can get out on my own, and instead just fondly shake my head as I slip my hand into his. His gentlemanly behavior is habit for him, especially after dating women for most of his life. And now that I’ve met his parents and watched them interact, the way Paul subtly pulled out a chair for his wife at the breakfast table even in their own home, I know it’s practically hardwired into him. It’s taken some getting used to, but if I’m being honest, I kind of like being doted on. I never thought I’d have that.

I step up onto the curb and wait as he gets my bag out of the trunk. Then, we stand for a moment looking at each other, my bag at our feet. It’s a little funny that I nearly chickened out on coming on this trip, and now I don’t want it to end. But, God, I really don’t want to go. He doesn’t seem to want me to either. I’d worry that it’s wishful thinking, except the energy in the air between us is a lot like that night a few weeks ago when we finally gave into this… thing between us.

Letting out a small sigh, he gathers me into his arms for a tight hug. “Call me when you get home—and I mean it, okay? Don’t try to play the ‘I didn’t want to bother you while you’re busy’ card. I want to know that you’re home safe, otherwise I’m going to worry.”

I chuckle quietly. “I don’t want to bother you while you’re busy, though,” I tease before stepping back. “I’ll text you, how about that?”

“I’ll accept that compromise,” he says with a soft smile. Then, he leans in and presses a kiss to my cheek just shy of the corner of my mouth. “I’ll see you in September?”

I nod, then swallow past the stupid lump in my throat. I don’t know why I’m getting emotional. It’s only a few weeks. I’ve gone longer without seeing him. Except that was while this was still fake. Still, there’s no reason for me to feel this unsettled.

I mentally shake myself and bend down to hoist my bag onto my shoulder before sending him a smile. “Good luck with campaigning.”

“Bye, darlin’,” he says, pressing one last kiss to my cheek.

“Bye,” I echo. Then I turn and head into the train station, stuffing down any instinct to turn around again.

“Do we want another round?” Casey asks, gesturing toward the bar behind him.

“Yes, please,” Sophie exclaims.

He looks at me expectantly. “Adrian?”

I glance down at my still half-full gin and tonic I’ve been nursing for the last hour, then shake my head. “No, thanks.”

He gives me a small, sad smile, then nods and grabs the empty glasses to head to the bar. He knows I’m in a funk. I’ve been in a funk for almost three weeks, and although I’ve mostly been refusing to talk about it, he knows why. Which is why he suggested we come out to a board game bar this evening so I could try to get out of my head. It’s not working, though. I still have that tight feeling in the pit of my stomach. I still can’t stop checking my phone every fifteen minutes for a text I know isn’t there since I have my ringer turned on and I haven’t heard Jamie’s text tone.

It’s been like this since about five days after I got back from Raleigh. At first, I was okay. I had a stretch of four shifts in a row since I’d had to switch some around to go to North Carolina in the first place. And it kept me busy so I didn’t really notice the uneasy feeling in my chest. But on that fifth day, I finally had off, and the realization that Jamie and I would be in different states for a whole month settled over me like a suffocating blanket.

We’ve been texting almost constantly. Or, at least, I’ve been texting him—just little things throughout my day, like weird pet names, funny lines from the book I’m currently reading, or pictures of Joseph and Molly. He always responds, sometimes it’s late at night, but he does. More often than not, he’ll call instead of texting back, and it always seems like he’s happy to hear from me. But the small voice in the back of my head keeps whispering that I’m bothering him. That he’s busy, and I should let him work without distracting him. That I’m being clingy. Dependent.

I don’t want to be clingy. That’s not who I am. If I were a clingy person, I wouldn’t be able to go from one-night-stand to one-night-stand with ease. Right? If I were a dependent person, this wouldn’t be my first relationship.

Except, maybe I am clingy and dependent, and that’s why I’ve been so against long-term attachments of any kind. Did I know deep down that if I did ever get into a relationship, I would be like this?

“Adrian?”

I mentally shake myself and turn my gaze from where I zoned out toward Sophie. “Sorry, what?”

She gestures at the board. “It’s your turn.”

“Oh.” I blink at the table for a moment, then grab the dice and roll them.

“Oh, yay, brick!” she claps and plucks her resource from the piles.

Mindlessly, I collect my resources and set the dice in front of Casey’s seat.

“And it looks like Casey got more sheep.” She takes a card and puts it face up on his stack of cards. “Are you going to build anything?”

“Um…” I take a quick glance at my cards, then place a road heading vaguely in the direction of the nearest port. I don’t really have a strategy right now. I’ve never been great at this game, even when I have my full focus on it.

Just in time for his turn, Casey returns with new drinks. “What did I miss—Sheep? Again? You’ve got to be kidding me.”

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