Page 60 of A Night To Remember

Charlie went completely still. All this time she had thought Jake had only wanted a physical relationship with her. How could she have been so blind? She had been so busy trying not to fall in love with him herself she hadn’t noticed Jake falling in love with her. Had she known how he felt about her, she would have run the other way.

Knowing Jake loved her put things into a different perspective. She would have to disabuse him from any thoughts of his love being returned. Loving him back was just not a gamble she was willing to take.

“Charlie, say something,” Jake said with anxiety.

“Jake, I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you’ll marry me and make me the happiest man alive. We’ll have a big wedding with all our family and friends there. Kristy can be the flower girl…my nieces and your friend Laura can be bridesmaids. My family will be thrilled,” he said with an excited gleam in his eyes. He had this all thought out.

“Whoa. You’re going too fast. First of all, I didn’t say I’d marry you. Second, I don’t love you.”

Jake paled. “What?” he asked with widened eyes, looking as if he couldn’t believe she was rejecting him

“I don’t love you, Jake,” she repeated, trying to be as gentle as she could.

He looked at her with pain-filled eyes. “You practically threw yourself at me. I thought you loved me, too.” He sounded on the verge of tears. He took deep shallow breaths as though he were hyperventilating.

“Jake, are you okay?” Charlie asked with genuine concern. It hadn’t been her intention to hurt him but, then again, she didn’t know she would be put in this situation. “Jake?” she asked again uncertainly. He had lost all color in his face.

Jake took several minutes before he answered her. Anger contorted his handsome face. He leaped out of bed, startling Charlie by his sudden movement. He pulled her roughly against his chest by her forearms. She gasped in fear at the blaze in his ice blue eyes. “You’re lying!” he said vehemently.

“I’m not, Jake. I don’t love you. I’m sorry but it’s the truth,” she said tearfully.

“You do love me. I know you do.” He shook her with each angry word.

“Jake, let me go. You’re hurting me,” she ordered.

Jake looked down at her with a dark brooding look before he let her go. Charlie fell back against the bed. She rubbed her arms in order to get the circulation flowing once more. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that to you.”

“It’s okay,” she said quietly, recognizing the pain reflected in his eyes.

“No, it’s not okay. I had no right to manhandle you that way. I abhor violence against women.”

“You’re right, you didn’t, but I understand. I know you didn’t mean me any harm.”

“I didn’t but damn it, Charlie, how can you say you don’t love me when we just finished making love the way we did. We didn’t just fuck; we made love!” He raised his voice.

“Lower your voice, Jake, before you wake Kristy up.” Charlie said the only thing she could think to say. She didn’t want to have this conversation right now, and actually not at all.

“You didn’t care about waking Kristy when you were screaming my name, begging for my cock,” he accused brutally.

Charlie blushed. “Jake, it was just sex,” she argued.

“It wasn’t just sex, or at least it wasn’t for me. I told you I loved you and you tell me it’s just sex?”

“Jake, I’m sorry, but I don’t love you. I’m sorry you got the wrong impression but it was just physical,” she said with tears in her eyes. She wanted so badly to tell him she loved him but she just couldn’t allow herself to.

Jake sat back down on the bed.

“Charlie, I love you. I don’t care if you don’t love me back. Marry me and I promise I’ll spend my every waking minute making you happy. Maybe in time, you will grow to love me, too. Please, Charlie. Please say yes,” he pleaded, taking her in his arms, planting kisses all over her face.

Paul had promised the same thing but now he was dead. Charlie pushed against his chest. “No, Jake. I can’t.”

“Why can’t you? Please tell me, Charlie.”

Charlie looked at him. How could she tell him that if she allowed herself to love him, she would be in constant fear of losing him, and if she did lose him, how could she go on living?

“I just can’t, Jake,” she said, tears falling freely down her face.