Page 110 of Stay with Me

He crowds my space, backing me against the door and cups my face. He looks into my eyes. That pull is still there between us. It’s burning as hot as it always does.

Dipping his head, he nips at my bottom lip and groans. He licks at it before he sucks it into his mouth.

“Knight,” I whisper.

“Don’t.”

“We can’t.”

“Not this again,” he murmurs.

He takes my mouth in a searing kiss. He consumes all that I am, sending the butterflies in my belly flying. He takes from my mouth like he’s been craving this kiss for a lifetime. I lock my fingers in his hair, pulling a grin to his lips. When he cups my ass and pulls me into him, I come to my senses.

“Why can’t we? What excuse are you going to feed me this time?” he says against my lips.

“You know why.”

He purses his lips and looks into my eyes. So many emotions pass through those blues. I turn away not able to handle all that I see.

That shootout placed me back into reality. Danger is the business that Knight is in. Call me selfish, but I have to think about my baby.

“Come on. I can go through your list and shoot down all your bullshit excuses. You can’t use the white guy thing anymore. Your dad has accepted Bishop into the family,” he grumbles.

“That’s not fair. You make it sound … that’s not how I meant it.”

I remember every time we’ve had that talk. He caught me off guard the first time with talk of dating and getting to know my family.

“Yeah, baby, it is,” he says. “You wouldn’t get into a real relationship with me because you were afraid your father wouldn’t accept me.”

I release his hair and fold my arms across my chest. “That’s not what I said. You asked me if I thought my family would have a problem with me dating a white guy. I was honest with you and told you my father had a type he envisioned for me and my sister. You weren’t it. It had nothing to do with your color.”

He nips my lower lip again. “Why aren’t we together, Rem?”

“Your brother is married to my sister.”

He snorts. “What does that have to do with anything? Technically, we were a thing before they ever met.”

“Things have changed. I’m not what you need. I want to get married and have stability. I think we should let each other go.”

He takes a step back as if I’ve slapped him. However, I’m the one who feels like I’ve just taken the blow. For the first time, I’ve said those words and I know with my whole heart I don’t mean them.

A look of determination fills his eyes, and he moves to trap me against the car once again. Pressing his forehead to mine and cupping the sides of my face, he studies me and takes a deep breath. I close my eyes to shut out the deep connection I feel.

“Look at me, Rem. Look at me and tell me you don’t love me,” he says with so much emotion I nearly crumble before him.

The first drop of rain touches my hand that rests over his on my face. I need to go before it pours and those words spill out. I tug away and lift my umbrella to cover me just in time.

As much as it pains me, I force my feet forward. My heels clicking louder than they should. Pieces of my heart drop out and leave a trail as I walk away from him.

“If you love me, say it. Don’t be a fucking coward,” he bellows from behind me. “If you love me, fucking admit it. Say something, baby. Admit that shit.”

I freeze in the middle of the parking lot. I can’t force myself to keep moving. My phone buzzes in my pocket, no doubt Sheldon wondering why I’m late.

Pain rocks my body, I’m trying to move toward a man I don’t want, but he’s the safe one. The one who says all the right things, who looks good on paper. Yet he doesn’t move my soul, he’s not my peace. Sheldon will never be the father of my child.

However, I take a tiny step forward to the promise of safety. Even as I lift my foot, it feels like a betrayal to who I am and the man behind me. I bite back a deep belly sob.

“Reminisce,” he booms my name. “Don’t do this shit. You have no more excuses. I’m everything you want. Admit that shit and stop running from me.”

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