Page 22 of Myself

“Fuck, baby ...”

A bang comes on her bedroom door, and we both pause. Neither one of us moves; we don’t even breathe.

The bang comes again. “Jaycent, let’s go,” Ryder hollers. “Becca, why is your door locked?”

She pushes me away so fast that I stumble backward. She hurriedly gets dressed and runs out of her bathroom. I turn off the water to her shower and tuck my shirt back in. As I enter her bedroom, she throws my belt at me along with my jacket. She smooths her hair down and makes sure her clothes are on correctly while I replace my belt and shrug on my jacket.

Then she swings the door open. “Sorry,” she says cheerfully. “I must have pressed the lock in when I shut it.” She giggles.

I stand, breathing heavy and eyes wide at my friend as he looks down at her as if he fucking believes that. He walks in and picks her up swinging her around. “I’m so glad to have you home, sis,” he says.

I take a moment to let out a nervous breath and try to talk down my hard-on. It doesn’t help. The fact that I know her pussy is wet has my cock twitching.

He then looks at me. “You ready?” I nod once. “We have to be there in fifteen,” he reminds me.

“Where are you guys going?” she asks. “It’s late.”

“We are having drinks tonight with some friends from high school.”

She looks over at me, and if she’s hurt that we didn’t invite them, she doesn’t show it. We didn’t figure they’d want to go after spending most of their day traveling. It was pretty much given that they’d be exhausted.

I look over at her king-size bed in the middle of the room, and all of a sudden, I don’t wanna go. I’d much rather be here, in bed, with her. But instead, I say, “I’m ready,” and walk out without another word.

CHAPTER FIVE

BECCA

I fall onto my bed, my heart racing and my hands shaking. That was close. How I was able to keep it together without Ryder noticing is beyond me. I don’t know what happened or what he was thinking, but I’m not gonna question it. A part of me, the part that has always wanted Jaycent, needed him once again. When he kissed me, I froze like a deer in headlights. I wasn’t expecting it because we’re so hot and cold with one another. But then I felt a rush of need for him. All of him. I was never that way with Conner. But with Jaycent, I’ve always felt this pull to him.

I roll over onto my stomach and let out a scream of frustration into my bed. Now, I’m wet and unsatisfied. Rolling back onto my back, I close my eyes and listen to the silence.

I sit up and open my eyes, frowning. It is awfully quiet. I figured Ashlyn would run in here and demand an answer as to why she didn’t know this is where we would be living. I get out of bed and make my way down to her room, but as I come up to her door, I hear her talking to her mother on her phone, so I back away and go back to my room.

I lean my back against my door like I did earlier and look over my room. I hate it. It looks like sunflowers threw up in here. My mom decorated the apartment for me, and she chose yellow for my room. I hate yellow!

The king-size bed draped in yellow sheets and duvet sets back against a wall of windows overlooking Manhattan. A white dresser matching the bed sits in the far right corner. The bed sits high off the ground with two rows of drawers under it as well.

I spot my luggage tossed on the dark hardwood floor and fall in front of it. I open it up and start to take things out of it to try to take my mind off Jaycent. The desire to text him is strong, but I don’t wanna bother him. He’s out with my brother, and I don’t want him to accidentally see me texting him. Because what I really want to say is hey, come over after you’re done at the bar and finish what you started. Yeah, that wouldn’t go over well if Ry saw it.

**

The following morning went as well as I had expected—Ashlyn was mad at me. I was in the kitchen when she came in wanting to know why I didn’t tell her about the expensive apartment, and I had to reveal to her that people treat me different when they find out just how much money my parents have. I never thought she would, but the fact is still true. And I knew she wouldn’t be able to afford a place like this, but that wasn’t going to keep me from letting her live here with me. When I told my father I would only move in if she could live with me, he didn’t hesitate. My mother, on the other hand, didn’t like it. But there’s not much about my life that she does like. She thought it was time for me and Conner to start a life together. I’m so glad I don’t listen to her.

After Ashlyn had got ready, she left for her job interview, and now, I sit here on the couch. Staring out the windows of our apartment and looking over Manhattan, I wonder what I’m going to do today. I had a busy life in Seattle. I had a full-time job, and I went to school full time. I was constantly going to Seattle, but now, my life is at a stand-still. I don’t like it. I could call up old friends, but I didn’t have many of those when I lived here before. The ones I used to have, I still follow on social media. They have either moved away, now have five children that their nannies raise, or are already divorced and partying their life away. I just don’t want to get involved in that kind of stuff. High school was full of drama, and I see their adult life as pretty much the same.

I look down at my phone as I hear it ring. Jaycent lights up my screen. I smile and hit answer. “Hello?”

“Good morning.”

My smile grows as I lean back on the couch. “Good morning.”

“I was wondering what you have planned for tonight?” he asks, cutting right to the chase. I’ve always liked that about him.

I bite my bottom lip. “Nothing that I know of.” I’m not sure what Ashlyn has planned, but I’m sure whatever it is, it will be with my brother.

“I was wondering if you would like to have dinner with me?”

I move to lie down on the sofa my feet thrown over the back. “What do you have in mind?” I try to sound like I have a choice in the matter when I don’t. I’d do anything he wants. He’s more of a threat to me than Conner ever was. I liked Conner—hell, I loved Conner—but Jaycent was my first love. The first guy I ever looked at and got weak in the knees. If he gave me a second chance, I wouldn’t let him go. But it also helps that he’s a better guy than Conner ever was.

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