Page 8 of Myself

––––––––

JAYCENT

I sit back as I chew on my bacon and look over at Becca. Her head is down, and she acts like her cold and soggy food is more important than the elephant in the room—me.

I thought four years would be enough time to get over her, but looking over at her proves it wasn’t. I debated whether to come with Ryder on this trip. On having to face her after what we shared. But the need to see her outweighed any doubt I had. I had overstepped twice with her. Once on her eighteenth birthday and the second time, six months later after a graduation party. No one knows what we did—I haven’t told anyone anyway. I was too ashamed at what I had done. And too hurt from her goodbye.

I have psyched myself up for the past two weeks that I was going to see her smiling and laughing. And how I was going to talk myself down from touching her. But Ryder just crushed that idea. She’s back with Conner? I hate that piece of shit!

And now that I look over at her, I hate him even more. She has this look of pure sadness on her face. Her brother doesn’t see it. I’m not even sure her friend sees it. But I saw it all the time when she lived at home. Her mother would make her feel that way, and then when she started seeing Conner, he made her cry often. It was like she traded in one controlling relationship for another.

She tries to put a fake smile on her face and asks Ryder what he wants to do today on his special day. He answers, but I wonder if she really cares. She does because she is that type of person, but she is dying inside. I can see it. I can feel it. Becca has always been different from the other girls we ever hung out with. We were all spoiled rich kids who would eventually grow older and get access to our trusts funds, but she never cared about the money or her name. She cared about people and their feelings. Even now, you can see it all over her face. She’s hurting, and I hope I’m not the cause of that pain.

I listen to them discuss their plans for the day—how they want to celebrate Ryder’s birthday—and I chuckle and say a one-liner here and there, but she has all my attention. Her dark hair is up, giving me a clear look at her face. Every now and then, her green eyes look over at me, but then they look away the moment she sees me staring. I can’t help it. I haven’t always been drawn to her, but it was like the moment she became legal, she became mine. That was wishful thinking on my part. After the night I kissed her at her party, I swore I would never touch her again. That what we did was wrong, and I should be ashamed. I was. She had a boyfriend, and I had just broken up with my long-term girlfriend. But the worse part was she was eighteen, and I was twenty-five. I should have felt sick to my stomach and ashamed, and both came eventually. But at that moment in the bathroom with her, that was nowhere close to what she made me feel. And I kept my distance for six months when I found myself in an even more compromising position with her, and once again, I couldn’t tell her no.

The sound of her voice is still fresh in my ear from that night we spent in the back seat of my car. The way her smile lit up the night. Her hands were all over me; greedy. I liked it. I remember her riding me, her head tossed back and eyes closed. The way she moaned my name ...

“Jayce ...” she pants as her hips grind back and forth. Her tight pussy wrapped around my cock. She’s so wet.

My arms wrap around her waist, and my hands flatten on her small back. “Oh, God, baby ...” I groan as my eyes look at her perfectly round tits as they bounce up and down. I use my hands to push her forward, and I lick my lips before I open them. I take her hard pink nipple into my mouth and suck on it.

She gasps loudly, and she throws her head back. I bite down on it gently, and she slams her hips into mine. I let go of her nipple and move to the other one, repeating the process. “You feel so good,” I tell her as my hands move up her back and into her hair. Her body slapping into mine as she picks up the pace, pushing me closer to the edge. I grab her hair as the air grows thicker around us. “So good...” I moan as her pussy tightens around my cock.

“I’m gonna come,” she says breathlessly.

I’ve imagined her saying those words before, and not once did it sound that sexy. “Fuck, Becca,” I say, needing more of her. I wish we had more space, like in a bed. I want to lay her down. I want hours with her, not just minutes. “Come, baby,” I say, letting go of her hair and gripping her hips.

She sucks in a breath as I quicken her pace. My hard cock is slamming into her wet pussy. The sound of our bodies slapping and her gasps fill my car.

“Jayce ...” She cries out as I feel her come undone.

Great, now I’m hard remembering that night we shared together. I clear my throat and smile at Ashlyn, needing a distraction. “How long have you guys been friends?” I ask, pointing a finger back and forth between her and Becca.

“Four years,” she answers.

I tilt my head to the side and drop my hand. “And you slept with Ryder last night? Her brother.” Her face pales a little. “But didn’t realize he was her brother until this morning? How is that possible?” Do I really fucking care? No! All I care about is that brunette who has made my cock hard. “I’m gonna come ...”

She sighs heavily as if sleeping with him was the worst decision she’s ever made. I look to see Ryder smiling like it was the best night of his life. I know what that feels like. I had that with Becca. “She talks about Ryder a lot, and she has pictures of him in her room, but they are mostly from when they were younger. I mean one of them is a picture of him and her from like ten years ago. He has a bowl cut and sunglasses on as they stand outside in what looks like a park,” she explains, and I laugh, but I don’t find it funny. “I’m gonna come ...” “I didn’t recognize him in the least when I met him last night. He was wearing a hat, sunglasses, and had facial hair. Plus, he said his name was Ry, not Ryder.”

“I haven’t even seen Ryder in four years,” Becca chimes in, and her voice alone makes my already hard cock twitch. “The most recent picture I have of him was four years ago at my high school graduation. And he’s changed a lot since then as well.”

“Plus, it’s not like I paid attention to his pictures,” Ashlyn says with a careless shrug.

“You paid attention to me last night,” he adds. She narrows her eyes and thins her lips at him. “The truth hurts,” he adds, and I laugh again as I’m listening.

“And it’s not like he has any social media pages for me to follow or to grab current photos from,” Becca says, looking over at him. “You really need to join the world and get with social media, Ry.”

He shrugs. “That shit is nothing but drama.”

“Oh.” Ashlyn places her elbows on the table and locks her fingers together as she smiles at him. “Sounds like you’re talking from experience.”

“He is,” I answer. I take another piece of his bacon, and he shoves my hand away. I look at Becca, and she isn’t looking my way. “He pisses off women, and then they try to get even—”

“Let’s not talk about Ry’s love life at the moment,” Becca interrupts me. “I wanna get back to planning your birthday today,” she says, looking at Ryder.

“We don’t need to do anything for it,” he tells her.

She waves that off. “How about we go out tonight and hit the bars to celebrate?”

---