Page 44 of Phoenix Fire

Jenny sat in the corner of the room by a fake rubber tree plant, watching the now placid face of Grandma Myrena in sleep. Bless her heart, Jenny thought, it was such a hectic and painful five hours.

With all the other unpleasant concerns in her life, Myrena had some sort of blockage in her trachea. According to Dr. Paige, the windpipe blockage, in and of itself, was a short term problem, an aberration, he had said. Anyone at any age could have such a blockage but if treated promptly would not be life threatening.

As fate would have it, Wardley was just seeing Dr. Paige into the house when Myrena's trachea obstruction was at a critical juncture. The doctor's quick action had precluded an ironic and paradoxical ending for Myrena.

The doctor had directed Myrena be taken first to the ICU but she had only remained there for about an hour. She was sent to her private room, where she would stay for at least three days. She would stay until a battery of tests were run. Presumably, three days would be adequate time for the tests. Also, the doctor wanted to better understand her cancer so that he could be reasonably sure that the prescribed medication would be sufficient to handle the pain. He did not want to take any more chances. He had thought all along that she was on the correct medicine. A noted Oncologist would be examining Myrena in short order to confirm prognosis and treatment. The doctor would cover every possible scenario before sending Myrena home.

Jenny smiled sadly at the irony. Grandma Myrena was dying of cancer, her time remaining not yet determined, and she nearly expired of something totally unrelated. Thank God. There was more time to find Jason and get him to Myrena's side.

Where was he? What could be going through his mind? Had Carlton's death brought Jason to this low point? She had not seen him to really know how devastated he was, but he must be in an agony she could not fathom. He could have been in an accident for all she knew. Maybe he was hurt. Maybe he was out of town and hurt.

Nora Hadley at Jason's office had not heard from him in several days. It was so unlike Jason, Nora had said. He had told Nora that he wanted some time to himself, but it was still so out of character for him to be out of touch for this long. Nora was baffled with his behavior and was concerned that so much work was piling up on his desk that needed his personal attention.

It was not so much his business that concerned Jenny. It was his dear Grandma Myrena. According to her, Jason had never before been out of touch for so long. Jason's absence made Myrena think that perhaps he knew of her terminal cancer. Part of her pain, or a contributing factor to her pain, was her personal anguish over Jason.

Jenny noticed some slight movement on the bed, rose and went to Myrena's side. Myrena's lids twitched lightly and finally fluttered open. She looked up at Jenny, blinked her eyes into focus and awareness. Her frail hand moved slowly to meet Jenny's. Myrena spoke in a weak whisper.

“Oh, my dear Jenny, we are putting you through the ringer, I'm afraid. You must have things to do. You must ...”

Jenny gently squeezed Myrena's hand and interrupted. “You are not to worry about my itinerary for a moment, Grandma Myrena. I have lots of sick days coming to me at work and it's about time I took them.” Jenny's soft sweet scolding brought a tentative smile to Myrena's face. “Besides,” Jenny continued, “I like being with you. My projects are up to date. There is no problem there, so, please, don't worry. Okay?”

“Thank you, Jenny. You are a Godsend. Has there been any word from Jason?” The question was asked in a manner suggesting she already knew the answer.

“Not yet, but I've left messages at his office and home. He should be in touch very soon.” Jenny gave Myrena another gentle squeeze and hopeful smile.

“I'm very concerned about him, Jenny. He has a vulnerable spot that most people don't see. I'm convinced that he knows of my cancer. Nelson will say nothing but I believe that he has talked to Jason.”

“But, in knowing, Jason would not stay away long. I'm just sure that he will show up soon.”

“I so hope you're right, Jenny, but I think it's time that we at least check into some possible scenarios.”

“What do you want to do, Grandma Myrena? What do you want me to do? I'll do anything you ask.”

“To be on the safe side, I think we should notify the police that Jason is missing. And we should ...”

Jenny interrupted. “But, if Jason's simply out of town on business or some other reason, that could cause him some embarrassment.”

“We don't know that he's out of town, Jenny. Nora Hadley would likely know if he was, and she is as concerned as we are. The point is,” Myrena's voice still just above a whisper, “Jason had never gone away without letting me know. And, surely, he would not leave Nora in the lurch like this. I believe that he is in terrible pain, maybe not so much physically as mentally. Emotionally, he has had simultaneous shocks: Carlton's death and my terminal cancer. Jason is not a weakling or a quitter, but he does have that vulnerable spot about which I spoke. Jason may be drinking to ease his pain, but it will only make it worse. I have seen his fragile side, Jenny. It can hurt him badly. We must cover all the bases.” Myrena sank deeper into her pillow.

“Then I will talk to the police immediately. I will also talk to Nora again and see if she might know something or someone that we're not considering.”

“You're a wonder, Jenny. It is so easy to see why Jason would be in love with you. Please don't blame him for his actions during this time, dear one. Every person has an Achilles heel. For all his good traits and moral character, Jason cannot handle too well matters of the heart and soul. You will help him through this bad time, I know. I can see in your eyes the love you carry for Jason each time I mention his name. You are my saving grace, my hope. I know that you will not let me down.”

They talked for some time.

Myrena shared childhood adventures of Carlton and Jason, relating the good times in their lives along with the bad. She talked of the family camping trips that brought the most joy to their young lives. She talked of Jason's love for music and his elementary school 'conductor' period. She talked about Carlton's proficiency in mathematics, how he loved playing and winning all the chess and backgammon games; how he loved their high desert adventures; how, at times, he would be so protective of Jason, like he knew Jason better than anyone else. She talked about Jason's eventual transition into business, his great love of land projects, particularly his lifetime project, 'Apple Brown Betty.'

Jenny talked as well, about her childhood, her mother and father. Jenny told Myrena about her father's easy way of turning her teenage problems into insignificant aberrations by uttering the simple phrase, 'Butterflies and Jellybeans.' Her father had conditioned her to the point where that silly little phrase could make her bad day turn good.

She told Myrena that her father had told her so many beautiful and fanciful stories in her youth, stories of heroism, courage, morality, justice, and love. He reminded her, in times of stress or trouble, to say aloud to herself that simple phrase, 'Butterflies and Jellybeans,' over and over like a mantra, and to remember the stories. The phrase was to trigger a subliminal joy within her.

The crazy thing was, when she did have a problem, the utterance of that phrase generally brought her out of her funk. Even today, she told Myrena, with Jason and you so much on my mind, just remembering those stories and that phrase helped her more than anything else.

Jenny told Myrena of her lightning experience which brought her fateful meeting with Jason and their natural evolution into love. She told Myrena that her father's simple phrase was chanted so many times recently to help her get over some rough patches, the concerns and worries about Jason. Oh, yes, she was still heartsick and worried, but she was also confident and hopeful of the future with Jason.

The talk between Jenny and Myrena became a comforting exchange, about love, family, and dreams. A point was reached where they avoided talk of tragedy and death. They avoided conversation about Carlton's death, Myrena's cancer, and Jason’s absence. They had talked enough of angst. They needed, wanted, to talk about light and joyful memories, and the conversation strengthened their bond and their mutual adoration.

The time together in the hospital room was good for both of them. The time would have a special place in their hearts forever. Myrena seemed to have more color to her cheeks, and Jenny thought that, if possible, the old matriarch even appeared younger.

---