Page 112 of Tame Me

Henry curled to my side, then fell to his knees at my feet. I opened my eyes, and he thumbed a tear from my cheek.

“I’ve had the most incredible year with you.” His words were calm, soothing, and a complete contrast to the torrent raging through my brain. “I was dead inside when we met in January. Now, I’m alive. You’ve brought out the best in me, and I’ve loved every minute. But now that your challenge is over, it’s time for you to set new challenges for yourself.”

“I wish I’d never told you about that.”

“I don’t.” He cupped my cheek. “Please don’t be mad. Be happy that we’ve had this time together. It was special.”

I blinked the blur away and looked right into his eyes. “It is special.”

He eased up on his knees, and when he wrapped his arms around me, the dam that I’d been struggling to hold back opened. Tears poured from my eyes down my cheeks and fell onto his bare back.

I wrapped my arms around him too, and as I cried on his shoulder, he continued to whisper sensibilities into my ear.

I felt like a fool.

A stupid, naïve fool.

He released me, cupped my cheek, and forced me to look into his eyes. “I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry that I let it go this far.”

“I’m not.”

He sighed, and his shoulders sagged. “No, you’re correct. I’m truly honored to have shared this experience with you. I know you’ll find someone. Someone truly special that you want to spend the rest of your life with.”

“You—”

He touched his finger to my lips. “I’m not, Jane. You’re blinded by our amazing sex. The man you love will give you amazing sex, too.” He stood, then leaned over to kiss my forehead. “Thank you for giving me my life back. I hope one day you’ll understand why I did this, and you’ll forgive me.”

It took me a few seconds to realize he wanted me to go.

As a prisoner of my new brutal reality, I allowed him to help me stand. I dressed in my trench coat, tugged the buttons into place, and tied my belt. Henry gathered my other bits and pieces from the floor and put them into my handbag.

He placed my bag over my shoulder, cupped my cheek, and kissed my forehead. “I will never forget you.”

I blinked up at his eyes, hardly able to believe this was goodbye. Silently, I turned and somehow made it to his door, and when he opened it for me, I refused to look at him as I stepped through and walked away from my suave tutor for the last time.

I was so numb that even tears failed to flow. My heart was a lump of lead in my chest that weighed me down with every step I took toward my apartment.

I went through the motions of having a shower, and in a brain fog, I stepped into my PJs and crawled into bed.

Normally, I’d spend this time writing in my diary.

Pouring out all my crazy thoughts had become my therapy.

Instead, all my stupid thoughts were trapped in my brain, whizzing around on a roulette wheel of hell.

My broken heart was a brutal realization that I was about to end this year exactly how I’d started it . . . single.

It was impossible to comprehend that after fifty-two weeks, fifty-two sexual experiences with so many wonderful men, and I was still all alone.

Something changed in me. I knew it—I felt it as if it were a pimple on the end of my nose, but I couldn’t decipher what it was.

I just hoped I’d be able to deal with it when I figured it out.

I closed my eyes and prayed that the wheel of hell spinning in my mind would stop.

Or I may not come off this mental cliff I’ve crashed into.

Chapter Thirty