Page 84 of Mercy in Betrayal

“Kind of?”

Beneath her pallor, a blush stains her cheeks. “I mean, I do, I just…I don’t—”

I let her fumble for a moment, amused and so in love my chest aches with the wonder of it, and then dip my head and shut her up with a kiss. She has Tom’s blood on her. I have Azrael’s blood on me, but through all this madness, I found Rowan. Breaking the kiss, I pull her more tightly to me, and she rests her head on my chest. I’m sure she can hear my racing heart.

It only beats for her.

I press a kiss to the crown of her head and tighten my hold.

I don’t let go until I hear a car pulling up close to us.

Our transportation has arrived.

Chapter 30

Rowan

Except for a hasty shower, Enzo hasn’t emerged from his study since we made it back to the house. He’s still closeted in there, taking phone calls and receiving furtive visitors who come and go quickly.

I’m not sure if everything has fallen apart or if it’s coming slowly back together.

The only thing I know is that whichever it is, I need us to be in it together.

“Mreoww.”

Clementine’s plaintive meow interrupts my thoughts and I look down at the bed I’m standing beside. He’s sitting in the open suitcase Enzo tossed on the comforter earlier with a single terse command.

“Pack.”

Clementine has been hopping in and out of it for the past hour as if reminding me to take him with me. He didn’t like being left at the Valachis, even if his stay wasn’t long. Vivi dropped him off before her fiancé whisked her away to her new home.

I stroke Clem’s fur and walk away to the window where I can see Manhattan. Staten Island is just out of view somewhere miles down the Hudson, with its quiet suburbs and Vivi and Ivan Romanov. I shudder, recalling the terrifying man who ironically helped me save Enzo and my brother. After everything she did for me, Vivi’s fate seems cruel.

I don’t know much about Ivan Romanov, but what I did see scares me.

“What’s this?” Startled, I turn to find Enzo looking at the suitcase. Clem hops out and stalks out of the bedroom with a swish of his tail. “We need to be packed, Rowan.”

“You haven’t told me anything. Where we’re going. What we’re doing. If you’re even going with me.”

Enzo’s irritated expression eases, and he moves to where I’m standing by the window. His hands settle on my shoulders and squeeze before he pulls me to him, his arms wrapping around my back. Closing my eyes, I let myself soften against him, reveling in his strength and steadiness. “I’m not going anywhere without you, little bird. Not ever again.”

“We’re going somewhere together.”

“Yes. I spoke with an old friend, Kai Nakano.” He pulls away so he can peer down into my face. “I helped him out with something once, and he owes me. Kai has a farm in Hokkaido. He says it’ll need a little work, but I don’t mind that.”

My brain is slow to process, but the words form meaning quickly enough. “Japan?”

“Yes. The Yakuza are strong there, but it's one of the few places the Commission has no influence over. We won’t have to worry about Azrael.”

Fucking Japan?

Enzo steps away and walks into the closet, and I trail him to stand on the opposite side of the bed. When he speaks again, his voice is muffled. “Hokkaido is a little colder than New York, so pack accordingly. And Kai’s father owns a fishing company. There’s the farm, of course, but that’s more a hobby-kind of lifestyle. I can find work as a commercial fisherman and make us a decent living. Nothing as lavish as this, of course.” He tosses a stack of clothing down on the bed and looks over at me. “But it’ll be exactly what you wanted, Rowan. An ordinary life. An honest life, far away from all of this. We’ll live on our little farm, and we’ll fill our house with children—what the hell is wrong?”

Tears are streaking down my face.

This is everything I’ve ever wanted. I mean—not Japan, certainly. I’ve never wished specifically for Japan, not in a million years.

But all I’ve ever wanted was to be the ordinary wife of an ordinary man. To have that man come home to me at the end of the day, loosening his tie instead of taking off his gun belt. To have his children play without fear in a grassy yard. To read to them from storybooks and let them dream dreams that might actually come true.

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