Page 151 of Gift from the Stone

Finally, the Gale family from the Central. They’re the closest to my family since their Primary grew up close to my mom and aunt Tilly. She’s right around their ages, but drama. She loves nothing more than to gossip and make herself out to be flawless. They don’t have any children.

Really, they all have some sort of attributes that would make me think any of them could be the traitors, but their negatives are equally matched to one another.

“I believe you boys have got everything we’ve got that’s going to be of use to you right now. Plus, whatever Gaster finds. Why don’t you go and freshen up, then let’s eat,” my mom says after the endless stretch of silence, each of us zoned into our research and thoughts.

Me and Caspian grunt our agreements and head to the west wing.

He doesn’t even bother making his way down to the room he grew up in, instead following me to mine. I swear I can fucking feel his eagerness to leave pouring off him.

Walking in, nothing has changed. It’s still as neat and orderly as I left it the last time I was here. And again, I feel nothing, no connection to this room whatsoever.

My room back at the mansion is much like this one.

A perfectly made bed without a single wrinkle, not a speck of dust on any surface, and minimal…well, everything’s minimal. The walls are all a light cream color, and my bedspread is a dark blue.

Until this moment, I haven’t given much thought as to why Willow’s never been in my room. We designed hers so she’d never have to bed hop or want to be anywhere else. We wanted her to have a space she could have to herself and one we could share with her. But as I look around the bland, stale space of my childhood room, it clicks.

I’m embarrassed.

Embarrassment is not an emotion I’m used to, but that’s exactly what this is. My princess is full of life and wonder despite everything she’s been through, whereas I’ve let the pressures, responsibilities, and heartache over the years make me strict, routinary.

I never want that life, the curiosity to dull, so I’ve avoided letting her see my dull room.

“What’s wrong?” Caspian asks as I stare around the room.

“This just doesn’t feel like home anymore,” I tell him honestly.

“That’s because it’s not. Home is where that maddening little Primary is,” he grunts and I can’t help but laugh at how worked up he still is.

“She really did a number on you today,” I tease, but my smirk falters a little at his contorted face.

“Just like you’re feeling now. This room, its blandness, its emptiness. It doesn’t feel right. I feel that too, but instead of a room, it’s anytime I’m away from her. The demons aren’t nearly as demanding when she’s around. It’s confusing, exhilarating, fucking…petrifying,” he breathes, running his hand through his hair.

I didn’t expect him to open up to me, so I force my face to stay blank rather than allowing my jaw to drop like it wants to. When we were growing up, he’d tell me any and everything. He’d bust into my room, jump on my bed, and spill every detail of his entire day.

After what happened, he wouldn’t speak to anyone. Not even me. It was years before he mentioned anything that had happened to him, and that was only after he and Tillman got into the most vicious fight any of us have ever had, over Tillman threatening to look in his mind if he didn’t open up.

Anytime after that, he’s been piss drunk. This is the first sober, real conversation about his feelings in almost eighteen years.

“Is it getting easier? Being physical with her?” I ask slowly.

“It’s getting harder not to touch her. I’d cut a bitch’s hand off if they tried to touch me, I know I would, but I crave that little Primary. My body does, my bond does. It’s my mind that still fucks with me. I don’t know how to let go completely.”

“When she first got here and wouldn’t answer my questions or do as I said without arguing, it drove me fucking nuts. I felt like I was losing my mind. It still drives me nuts, but then I think, what would it be like if she fell to my every whim, did exactly as I tell her when I tell her to. And I don’t like that version of her. She pushes me out of my comfort zone almost daily, but I wouldn’t change it. She’s pushing you out of yours now, and I know it’s hard, but it’s worth it. It’s so fucking worth giving in to her,” I tell him honestly.

She’s like taking a breath of the freshest air.

“She saw what happened to me in our awakening, but she doesn’t know everything. I think I’m ready to tell her. I know it’ll help,” he admits.

“I think it will too, brother,” I agree, giving his shoulder a squeeze. A touch he doesn’t immediately shake off.

Our baby steps have turned into big boy leaps.

“Aurora, dinner is delicious. Thank you for having me,” Gaster says, breaking up the silence.

Dinner conversation has consisted of our mom asking us personal questions and us giving her vague answers. We can’t really tell her what we’ve been up to. That’s staying a secret.

“Gaster, you know you’re welcome anytime. I wish you’d visit more too,” she says.