Page 108 of Gift from the Tree

The whole next day isn’t much better, although the healing vials Oakly provided both of us with completely cure our hangovers. My stomach and chest stay in a constant riot that keeps me crying, throwing up anything I eat, and it just adds to the misery I’m feeling.

The only productive thing we did the whole day was force myself off the couch and practice my earth element by the lake. Oakly told me it’s completely unheard of for someone to have multiple elements, and that it’d be incredibly dangerous for people to find out, so I need to keep it a secret.

For two long, miserable days, I avoid talking about or to the guys. Well, I haven’t answered a single call, not ready to hear the sound of any of their voices, but I sparingly reply to some of their texts.

Despite my rightful anger, I get flooded with guilt when one of them says, “please just tell us you’re safe and okay.” Even through the communicator, I can get a sense of the feelings they’re experiencing right now.

Corentin’s losing his absolute shit. His warning from his office replays over and over in my head and part of me wants to force his hand, dare him to come find me, prove to me the promises he’s texting aren’t just sweet words. Show me you mean it. But the other part of me knows I’d be a puddle at his feet if he showed up with those whiskey eyes burning for me.

Tillman’s being understanding, somewhat. His usually assured balance and calm come and go in waves. One minute he’s telling me he knows I need time and they just need to know I’m okay, then the next he’s ordering me home or fussing at me for ignoring them. He’s promised they’ll never keep another secret from me again, to please just come home.

Caspian’s just short, bossy. “Are you okay?” “Eat.” “Go to sleep.” “Text us when you wake up.” He’s not promising or saying much of anything.

Draken… Draken, on the other hand. I cry my eyes out before I even open his messages. He’s apologized a thousand different ways, told me countless times about how sorry he was, how much I mean to him, and says he’ll give me the world and anything else I could ask for. He’s begged me to come home in every message. I can’t help but think about every time I begged him to fuck me, he’d say there was so much I didn’t know, and he couldn’t do that until he told me everything. This was the everything he was referring to.

“Assholes already blowing you up this morning?” Oakly asks with so much sass as she hands me a cup of coffee, I can’t help the snort that leaves me.

“Of course they are. I ignored all of them last night, so I woke up to books and books worth of messages.”

“You ready to talk about it?” she asks, taking a sip of coffee. This is the first time she’s brought it up. She hasn’t pushed at all. She’s honestly been my rock, holding my hair while I throw up, cooking my food, laughing, and telling me stories to keep my mind busy.

“I feel like I got so much to say but yet nothing at all. They lied to me this entire time with multiple chances to come clean. Instead, they let me walk around like an emotional hot mess, feeling crazy for needing to be around at least one of them. Not to mention, it was Caspian who told me the truth. He was so fucking mean to me in the beginning before he went all ghost boy and floated through the walls to avoid me.”

Oakly lets out a loud laugh, throwing her head back, and it’s so contagious I burst out laughing despite trying to hold a serious face.

“Ghost boy… Oh, we needed that laugh…” she says as her chuckle fades out.

“The things Elementra showed me of them were rough. Many of the visions were so heartbreaking, but that made me feel connected to them because my whole life up until I got here was heartbreaking. I felt like we all had something in common despite it being a little dark and morbid. And they didn’t even bother to tell me what was happening was life-changing. I thought I was losing my mind, or it had something to do with my gift. They all had different reactions after our awakenings, but what we all saw didn’t create a joyous moment and none of them swept me off my feet in a moment of happiness.” I feel the tears filling my eyes again, and I try my hardest to force them away. I need to talk about this with her. If I don’t talk it out before I talk to them, I’ll flip my shit.

“Do you think you’ll forgive them?” Her question makes me pause and think for an uncomfortably long minute.

“I miss the way Draken calls me little pet names. The way he’d hold me like I was his world, and he could always tell what I was feeling and make it better. I’ve never laughed so much in my life than I do when I’m with him. He’s a constant ray of sunshine. He’s been a first of many things for me and is always willing to do what makes me happy. He makes me feel free.” Taking a deep breath, I continue thinking about the others.

“Corentin fixes my coffee perfectly every morning without me asking. His controlling nature drives me mad, but he tries, sometimes, to give me choices rather than tell me what I’m going to do because he knows I need that, just like I know he needs control. He notices everything. Nothing gets past him. I hate how he wears this blank expression all day every day, hiding himself from the world. No one ever asks him about his day or if he’s okay, so if I don’t do it, no one will. He takes care of everyone else, but no one’s taking care of him. I want to take care of him as much as he wants to take care of me.

“Tillman makes me want to be better, stronger but also small and delicate. He doesn’t know I notice, but his lip curls a fraction every time I get something right in training and his small show of pride fills me with a sense of approval I crave from him. But I also notice the way he shields me when we’re around a lot of people. It’s such a subtle move, I’m sure no one even notices it, but he always puts his body in front of mine. He won’t ever show it to others, but there’s a gentle side to him that I want all to myself.

“And Caspian, fuck, I don’t even know. The most we’ve ever spoken to one another was when we were at each other’s throats when I first arrived and then when he laid his heart out when we rescued him. What I saw in his awakening was gut-wrenching. He needs someone to save him, and I want to be the one who does it.” I let out a long breath as tears flow down my face.

“Yeah, I’ll probably forgive those assholes. Eventually.”

“Without trying to sound like I’m defending them because I’m not. Fuck them, for real. But they probably have more reasons than you’re thinking to keep this from you. I’ve seen the way their eyes eat you up. They most certainly want you. I don’t believe for a second that’s why they didn’t tell you. But they’re the most powerful family, the most powerful Nexus in Elementra. Being with them isn’t going to be easy.” She grabs my hand and gives it a squeeze.

“I know. It’s hard for me to convince myself that they didn’t want me based on how they’ve all treated me. Well, except Caspian, but it still fucking hurts to know that there are four people who were designed perfectly for you, and instead of celebrating the moment, they kept me in the dark, like some dirty little secret.”

She gives me a stern, no arguments kind of look, one that makes my lip twitch at her attempt to be serious with me. “You’re not a dirty secret, Willow. Don’t say that. And not to sound so cliché, but it’s all going to work out. Elementra has a plan for everybody.”

I nod at her and give her a small smile. “I’m sorry for fucking up your alone time.”

“Don’t be. I really wasn’t looking forward to being alone, but I refused to go see my family. Honestly, I wanted to spend some time with you and the other spent getting to know the guys a little before Ry pissed me all the way off,” she says with a little grin playing on her lips, making me die laughing. I’m pretty sure she’s already forgiven him, but she’s going to make him work for it.

“Well, I’m happy to be here with you, but I can get out of your hair whenever you want me to.”

“Nonsense, we need this before we go back to dealing with difficult fucking men. But speaking of men, this one isn’t very difficult. Gaster has been messaging me nonstop. He wants to come speak to you alone without the guys around,” Oakly says hopefully like I’ll tell her I’m ready. And part of me is. He’s been nothing but supportive of me since bringing me here. And maybe now I can get him to be open with me as well.

“I think I’m ready to see him, but not the others, not yet. If you’re okay with him coming here.”

“Of course I am. You know as soon as I send him this message, he’ll be here in seconds, so are you sure you’re ready?” she asks, completely supportive, ready to ignore him if I ask her to.

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