Page 66 of Gift from the Tree

Slamming the journal closed, I move through the shadows to her room. She brought nothing with her to this realm other than that box and now’s the only time I’ll have to go through it without her or any of the others here.

As soon as I step out of the wall, her sweet fucking coffee scent assaults me and the traitorous thing now living inside me pushes at its restraints, and I grit my teeth and bite my tongue until I taste blood. The fucking thing is supposed to feed on my own emotions, so why it’s fucking elated just at the scent of her is infuriating and I’m not willing to conclude any other reason for it other than it’s fucking broken, like me.

Picking up the box, I examine its fine attention to detail. Whoever made this for her is very crafty with their element, so there’s no doubt in my mind they’re natives to Elementra. My brother informed me of the note that accompanied her Memoria stone, but he either neglected to tell me the name addressed on the note or he’s unaware of it. I let a satisfied little smirk cross my face knowing that I have a start at figuring out who could be working against us with her.

Putting her shit back to where it was so she can’t tell it’s been touched, I transport back to the shadows of Corentin’s office, finding it empty aside from him and Tillman, so I lock my mental barrier up tight, even though we’ve got a good understanding about him keeping his nose out my fucking mind, and step on out.

“Where’s Draken?” I ask, playing dumb to the fact that I already knew he’d been here.

“Following Willow discreetly, despite her telling him to stay. No need to act like you weren’t here the whole time. I’m not a fucking idiot,” Corentin snarks, looking at me like I personally offended his intelligence.

“I just wanted to see what kind of lies the little spy would spew,” I remark. No matter how many times I try to convince myself it’s the truth, as the words leave my mouth, they taste wrong, but I ignore that and double down mentally on my beliefs.

“Cut the shit, Caspian. We know it’s highly unlikely she’s a spy. There’s no possible way to fake an awakening, and from what I saw, no one’s been training her to come here and fuck with us.” He snarls, getting pissed and defensive over the girl. Since his awakening has happened, I know it’s going to be even harder for me to push him to keep his distance from her, but I’ll chip away at it until I can’t anymore.

“We don’t know that. We have no clue what this person in these memories truly taught her. Regardless, let’s say you’re right that she’s not a spy. She’s just completely clueless, with locked up memories. You don’t think that on top of being our Primary is going to seriously put her in danger?” I ask, knowing I’m pulling a direct line to his and Tillman’s heartstrings.

Guilt instantly shoots through my body, knowing I’m doing wrong by them by pulling this card, but it’s the only way to keep them from going off the deep end with her like Draken.

“I’m going to protect her. We are. By the end of this month, she’ll be much farther along than she is now. She’ll be able to protect herself better and hell, who knows where the Memoria stone will lead us to by then.” He tries to reason, but I can see the wheels turning.

“Yeah, brother, could lead us right to her downfall, followed by our own,” I say before stepping back into the shadows.

I know by the look on both of their faces, the seed I just planted is rooting, taking hold of their fears of losing the one person they’ve waited their entire lives to meet. They’re all already falling for her, but I can push out the inevitable a little while longer, more than the month they’ve agreed on.

“What are you doing?” I ask, creeping out of the shadows behind where Draken’s hiding a few feet from Gaster’s door.

“Making sure my little wanderer’s okay,” he whispers.

“You have to back off, Draken,” I order.

“No, you back in. She’s our Primary and you three need to act like it.”

“We’re protecting her, Draken. There are too many unknowns surrounding her that could put her at risk because we’re clueless about what we’re dealing with. We’ve been here for you no matter what, brother, supported you any way you needed us to, so you need to do the same for us now and listen to what we’re telling you to do,” I command.

I have to back away immediately and leave before he says anything because the look of hurt that crosses his face for the shit I just said damn near tears me apart from the inside out.

It’s fucking wrong.

I know it is. I always swore I’d never bring up his past or treat him any differently for it, and here I go, throwing it in his face to make sure he doesn’t tell her the truth before I’m ready for him to.

I stay in the shadows and watch him for a minute to make sure he’s okay. The look of hurt that stays plastered to his face is a fucking knife to the gut and I fight with myself to just step back out and tell him I’m sorry, but I don’t get the chance as his phone pings, and within a second of receiving it, he’s slowly opening Gaster’s door.

Following him in, but covered by the darkness, I stare as he comforts the girl as she cries her eyes out. The tugging in my chest starts its shit again, and I shove the fucker back down with everything I’ve got. Feelings I don’t understand, don’t want to understand creep up on me as Draken slowly dries her tears and she gives him a smile that says it means the world to her that he’s here.

I want that. I don’t want that.

She’ll hurt you like the other one did.

She won’t. She will.

Give in. Fight with all you got.

Back and forth the demons I fight every day war within my mind and my sight clouds as I drift into the terror that’s haunted me for years. No. No. This is exactly why I won’t give in to her, to this fucking bond. I won’t be fooled again.

I’ll stay away from her. I’ll never allow her to touch me. I’ll protect my own blackened heart and soul.

Seventeen

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