Page 186 of The Home Game

“Maybe,” Antoni said but he was kinda doubtful. He squinted at the info about where the deposit had come from, trying to work out what that was. Why wasn’t the sender more clear and obvious? It was always some cryptic shortened version of the bank name or …

Oh. Oh.

“Fuck. I know what it is,” Antoni said hoarsely. “It’s … it’s Corey’s life insurance policy.”

“I thought they’d already paid the life insurance out to you,” Matty said, sounding confused. “You told me you set it aside for the kids’ education.”

“I did, but that was Bethany’s life insurance. She was, uh, a little more organized about stuff than Corey. He could be a little scattered. She mostly managed the household finances and stuff but his life insurance policy was from before they met. When I cleared out the house after—after their deaths, I dumped some piles of random papers I found stuffed in Corey’s desk into a couple of boxes to sort through later. It took me months to get through all of them and then I had to contact the company and there was some question about if he’d let the policy lapse. I was able to prove he hadn’t but it took a while. I guess they finally got it all processed and paid out.”

“Oh wow,” Matty said. “You doing okay?”

Antoni swallowed, his throat thick, his eyes pricking with tears. “I guess?”

“Baby,” Matty’s voice was so tender. “Do you need me to come get you?”

“No. No.” Antoni sniffed and blinked a few times. “No, I’m okay. We can talk more about it tonight but I’ll be fine to drive home.”

“Okay, I’ll see you there. I’m at Dustin’s so it won’t take me long.”

“No, don’t rush on my account,” Antoni said. “See you soon. Love you.”

“Love you too.” Matt’s voice was soft and Antoni had to blink back more tears.

He was careful as he drove home, knowing that it wasn’t the safest thing to be behind the wheel when he was feeling emotional. But he made it home without any issues and a part of him was glad to see Matty’s vehicle already in the garage.

His dad had already left and Matty was in the living room with the kids. Antoni got hugs from everyone and he kissed Matty hello and he knew that outwardly he probably looked and acted pretty normal but he felt strange inside.

Like some part of him was looking at the world from a distance.

Like he wasn’t really there at all.

“You need anything?” Matty asked, frowning, as he crowded Antoni against the kitchen counter. “You can go for a run while I watch the kids, if you want. Or do whatever.”

“I don’t know,” Antoni said and that was the truth. “It started raining so I’m not really in the mood to go for a run. Maybe a little time alone?”

He felt guilty asking for it, didn’t want to ignore the kids or Matty, but …

“Of course.” Matty kissed his forehead. “Say no more.”

He turned away and Antoni immediately missed the warm strength of his body but Matty was already calling out to the kids. “Hey, Alexis, Eli, are you done with homework?”

“Yeah,” Alexis said, looking up from her tablet.

“Yep, all done!” Eli grinned.

“Okay, why don’t we do a little bit of shooting practice before we cook dinner? Antoni needs some quiet time.”

Alexis frowned. “Do you have a headache or something?”

“No, just had a long day,” Antoni said with a weak smile. “I’ll be fine. I just need to … decompress.”

“Oh, okay. Yeah, we can shoot,” Alexis said, already getting to her feet. “C’mon, Eli.”

And it wasn’t like they ever had to twist her arm to do anything hockey-related but it was still sweet the way she was worried about him.

Antoni swallowed thickly.

The emotion pressing against his throat only worsened as Eli darted over to hug him. “Love you, Babbo Antoni.”

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